I was gonna do this week’s entry starting out by making fun of Strong Bow’s listed abilities, which include the fact that he has very strong legs since he walks a lot. But then I looked at him and I changed my mind.
I changed my mind because fucking look at him. This is not some happy nature warrior. Look at the face. This guy is a stone-cold killer. He’s not a psychopath or a kill-crazy fun-seeker or a berserker ninja samurai Canadian possibly descended from a race of werewolves or something. He’s not somebody who kills people for fun; there’s no pleasure in it for him. It’s just what he often ends up having to do, and he’s just really, really good at killing people. You can tell just by looking at him, and by the way he holds that giant fucking knife.
This, my friends, is a total one hundred percent badass. Look at the background art, where he is stabbing a dinosaur to death. Maybe he needs meat for a long journey. Maybe the dinosaur decided to try and kill him, and found out the error of its ways. It doesn’t really matter. Strong Bow doesn’t care either way. It’s nothing personal. It’s just that the dinosaur has to die. Somewhere in the universe’s cosmic planner, somebody wrote “today, Strong Bow kills dinosaur,” and the reasons are really besides the point; there’s need for him to kill a dinosaur, so he kills the dinosaur.
Maybe I’m basing all of this on one bit of art, but so what? Look at it.
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I think that Dinosaur’s actually a Gator. Doesn’t stop him being 100% badass though.*
*Although if 100% badass = 72% Rex-TMF-Wonderdog, we may be on our way to mathematically determining the precise amount of badassery we need to equate Rexhood…
Let’s not forget the fact he’s RIDING A FUCKING BUFFALO. That’s like riding a particularly ornery bull.
This man has chops.
Clint Eastwood takes a certain pride in the fact that he never killed any Native Americans in his Western career.
There’s a reason for that, of course, and you’ve just met him.
Was the name “Big-ass knife” already used in his family?
Plus, he inspired his own alcoholic cider!
http://www.strongbowcider.com/ ftw.
I should point out that that knife is almost certainly made of stone: AFAIK the only metal worked by Natives before European contact was copper, and that doesn’t look like copper to me. In other words, this guy kills dinosaurs (or possibly alligators, but still) with a STONE KNIFE. Badass indeed.
Looks sorta like Solomon Kane as a Native American.
Haha, he can’t ride horses yet, so fuck it, he rides a buffalo.
I can’t hear this name (or drink this cider) without immediately thinking of ElfQuest — a sad side effect of my 5th-grade reading habits.
Based on your disparaging comments regarding Green Arrow’s weaponry, and the fact that this guy is holding a BIG DAMN KNIFE instead of a bow despite his name, I think we can see why you really like Strong Bow.
By which I don’t mean to imply he isn’t badass. He could pretty clearly kill me with one hand.
I like how Strong Bow steps outside of the usual superhero mold.
* His origin comes out of pre-Columbian America and his adventures presumably involve tribes who will not meet Europeans for several generations. Unlike most Native American comic book characters he is not defined by his relationship to white people.
* He doesn’t have any astounding powers (the closest thing he has to a superpower is “expert archery,” which I suppose puts him in somewhere the top twenty percent of bow hunters), but he has become a legendary figure anyway. Like the best of heroes his powers come from his wits, his courage, and his relationships with other people.
* How many other comic book characters have “diplomacy” as anything more than an Informed Ability? That’s usually a good thing, because comic book diplomacy usually involves a lot of text balloons and contrived resolutions of contrived disputes. Whereas I can imagine Strong Bow’s mission to make peace driving interesting stories and being handled in a realistic way.
If I had to change anything about him it would be his costume – or specifically, the superfluous bands on his arms and wrists. I don’t see a character like Strong Bow wearing a distinctive costume of any kind; instead, he’d wear something functional and allow his deeds to speak for themselves.
So… is he even capable of smiling?
I would be more impressed with his strong legs if they had depicted him kicking a dinosaur to death.
The fact that his occupation is “Peacemaker” is even better.
Obviously that’s the source of his facial expression. So many people don’t want peace when it’s offered, and try to start something. What’s a guy to do?
I have to wonder if the next person in line behind the person Strong Bow kills proves more willing to listen.
Now I see the inspiration for Sten. Rock on, MGK.
(Dragon Age, still insanely awesome.)
Comics need many more Native American characters. I would not be surprised if Rex was buds with this guy.
is he Turok?
There is a man who knows there is work to be done.
He looks like a native American Punisher.
I think you gotta give this guy more than just 3/4 Rex. THIS guy’s at least 83% Rex.
Nathan Explosion + Village People = Strong Bow
He IS smiling.
It’s funny; when you said, “Look at his face,” I did, and my immediate mental response was, “I’m strong to the finish ’cause I eats me spinach, I’m Popeye the Sailor Man!”
Seriously, I can’t be the only one who sees the resemblance, can I? Look at that huge, jowly chin! If it’s not Popeye, they go to the same plastic surgeon!
It says something that the guy’s name is Strong Bow and the illustrations show him wielding, and using, a very big knife.
And that something is “Watch the fuck out for Strong Bow.”
I’m glad I’m not the only one who instantly thinks of Elfquest when encountering Strong Bow. And it’s been over a decade…
I’ll note however, that considering this man stabs dinosaurs to death with a stone knife, if they’re calling out the strength of his legs specifically then the man can obviously kick his way through solid rock, to say nothing of your fragile meaty rib cage.
He showed up in IE. Probably threw his knife through Batman’s robo-saur on reflex and kicked someone in the balls, THEN helped save the world.
“So, what’s your name?”
“Strong Bow.”
“But…you don’t HAVE a bow.”
“Yes. Bow made things too easy.” Holds up knife. “This makes people listen the first time.”
We got the cider named after him because he punched the fuck out of some apples.
Jason Aaron vertigo miniseries. Now.
That’s probably how he carved his knife. With his feet.