ME: So I was watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine last night and
FLAPJACKS: Ugh who cares I wanna talk about the Batman show with no Batman.
ME: Oh, yeah, Gotham. That sounds a bit odd, doesn’t it?
FLAPJACKS: Well, I don’t see what the point is of a show about Batman with no Batman.
ME: For starters, the show is about Commissioner Gordon, not Batman.
FLAPJACKS: Look, that’s a cheat. First off, it’s not like anybody asked for a Commissioner Gordon show. Would you want a show about Alfred, too? Back when he was a British spy and secret agent and wait that actually sounds great so never mind that, but a Commissioner Gordon show is basically just Law and Order unless you put in super-villains. And if there are super-villains, then where the hell is Batman in this show?
ME: Maybe it’s no super-villains and it’s like a show where Gordon is a Good Cop and the rest of the force is corrupt because it’s Gotham City and they are the true villains.
FLAPJACKS: They already did a corrupt cop show and that was The Shield.
ME: Except that I just described the exact opposite of that show. Jim Gordon is the anti-Vic Mackey.
FLAPJACKS: EXCEPT except that thanks to the early promo material for the show we already know there are gonna be supervillains. They all but said so.
ME: They also said that Rage was gonna show up in Agents of SHIELD and that turned out to be a guy called Mike Peterson, which is like the least superheroey name ever.
FLAPJACKS: Was that official promotional buzz or was that nerds trying to guess things by randomly naming black characters from Marvel with super-strength?
ME: I personally cannot tell the difference any more.
FLAPJACKS: Anyway. Look, part of the thing about Batman that people like is that his villains are obsessed with him. Let’s assume that some supervillains are going to show up in this Jim Gordon show, because seriously, why would they not put supervillains in the TV show set in Batman’s city? Isn’t there already a cop show without supervillains on the air?
ME: Well, there’s Brooklyn Nine-Nine –
FLAPJACKS: Sitcom, doesn’t count.
ME: Maybe Rookie Blue?
FLAPJACKS: That’s a coming-of-age show that happens to be about cops.
ME: Almost Human?
FLAPJACKS: Robots are basically supervillains anyway.
ME: Blue Bloods?
FLAPJACKS: That’s more of a family drama than a cop show although you do have to admire Tom Selleck’s moustache, which is very Jim Gordonish.
ME: NCIS: Los Angeles?
FLAPJACKS: That’s the one. See? We’re covered. We have a cop show without supervillains already! We don’t need another one!
ME: I bow to your inescapable logic.