Sep

Talking With My New Roommates

Posted by MGK Published in Bad Comedy, Conversations

ME: Hey, whose “Equality” brand lemonade is this?
ERIC: It’s mine.
ME: Can I have some of your off-brand pre-made lemonade?
ERIC: Take as much as you want. Please.
ME: …is it bad?
ERIC: It’s really, really sweet. As lemonade it’s terrible. As a mixer, it’s tolerable.
ADAM: I find it goes well with gin.
KAREN ((Adam’s girlfriend): Honey, you don’t like gin.
ADAM: Yes I do.
KAREN: When we started going out, I remember one time we were at your place and your roommate offered us gin and tonics and you said you don’t like gin.
ADAM: That’s right.
KAREN: What happened?
ADAM: I drank some of it later on.
ME: That’s how you can tell he’s a professional chef. He’ll try anything to sample flavours.
ADAM: Actually, I wanted to get drunk, but that works too.
ME: Incidentally, this lemonade does go rather well with the gin, but…
ERIC: But?
ME: Now that I am drinking it, I find that I have my mind on my money and my money on my mind.

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Sean said on September 10th, 2008 at 11:48 pm

That made me laugh. Very good, sir!

Evan Waters said on September 11th, 2008 at 1:24 am

True, but you can at least say that of your myriad of problems, a female is not one.

Evan said on September 11th, 2008 at 2:22 am

Hee!

Pat! said on September 11th, 2008 at 2:28 am

ME: Now that I am drinking it, I find that I have my mind on my money and my money on my mind.

LOL!!

Eric S. Smith said on September 11th, 2008 at 8:00 am

I’ve often said that E-quality is a bit lower than what I’d prefer; A-quality, B-quality, even C-quality…

(It’s a good try for a store brand name — “Equality, see, it’s just as good and $1.25 cheaper!” — but it’d help if they didn’t typically scrape the bottom of the barrel in picking what to slap the label on. Equality baking soda cleans stuff just as well as any other, mind you.)

Justin Mohareb said on September 11th, 2008 at 8:24 am

Laaaaaaid back!

Adam said on September 11th, 2008 at 11:57 am

This lemonade has Eazy’s seal of approval on it. Also look for E-quality Indoe, in stores near you soon.

Zak said on September 11th, 2008 at 11:50 pm

http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/08/18/107-self-aware-hip-hop-references/

I feel this is apt.

Rob Brown said on September 12th, 2008 at 6:00 pm

Now that I am drinking it, I find that I have my mind on my money and my money on my mind.

I was unaware that this state could be achieved while stationary. As opposed to, say, rolling down the street.