And yes, people who are not sexist can say unintentionally sexist things, either because they’re not thinking through the implications of their statements or because they don’t think of those implications as sexist due to cultural blinders. I think it’s important to call people on those things, because things like that really are in the ear of the listener, not the mouth of the speaker. If someone is hearing your comment as sexist, it probably is. Nobody hears what you intended to say.

For what it’s worth, I am sorry that I was so flip and snarky in my initial comment; I forgot the cardinal rule of the Internet, which is “Never say anything you wouldn’t say to someone’s face.” (Well, it’s my cardinal rule, anyway.) I really should have tried harder to convey that point in a way that wouldn’t make you feel defensive about it, and I didn’t. Instead, I tried to sound pithy, and came off as rude. I really am sorry about that.

But I’m going to stand by my point; bringing up the specific job that she used for her memoirs is irrelevant to your claim that she’s being smug and obnoxious about her success, and creates the impression that you feel that her sex appeal was more important than her talent in getting her break. You can just say, “There was a lot of luck involved in her success, just like there’s luck involved in the success of anyone who makes it big. That doesn’t mean she doesn’t have talent, but there are plenty of people who are as talented as her if not more so that never got that lucky break, and lording it over them with claims like ‘Incidentally, if you were me for one day you’d crumble like fucking Stilton. I am better at this than you. You’re not strong enough, Film_Fan78. Trust me,’ misses the role luck played in her success.” Says the same thing, doesn’t muddy the issue with sex.

And I’ll also say that bringing her sex work up again in the middle of your explanation that her sex work isn’t relevant seriously undercuts your message. The very phrase “I’m sure Cody worked her ass off just as soon as she removed the dildo from it,” sounds insincere. It makes your claim of believing that she worked hard sound like a straight line, not a real belief. Do I believe you when you say that wasn’t your intent? Sure. But I still think it was an unwise joke to use at that particular juncture.

Mind you, I still don’t care about either side’s actual points, but do not bring that sexist BS into my dojo.”

But you don’t think I’m a sexist douchebag? Just that I spout sexist BS?

I wasn’t apologizing for anything; I was trying to explain it to the people who didn’t understand it. Which may have been my fault, or may have just been been people’s misinterpreting what I said (as, let’s point out, MGK allowed might be the case). MGK may not know me very well, but he does allow me the great honor of guest-contributing to his site, so I hope he’d give me the benefit of the doubt here (as he seems to, by allowing the possibility I might say he’s misinterpreting what I meant). I’d argue, in fact, that there’s nothing at all sexist in my comment but rather you’re reading into it, and in fact, what MGK takes umbrage with is not some sort of sexism but rather the interpretation that I implied I thought she cheated (which, as I said, I certainly don’t, because ‘cheating’ is irrelevant to the situation. Nor do I think she had more or less advantage than anyone else. I think it’s an equal playing field, and Cody is, in fact, the only person who has said otherwise ["Incidentally, if you were me for one day you'd crumble like fucking Stilton. I am better at this than you. You're not strong enough, Film_Fan78. Trust me."]). I never meant to imply that capitalizing on anything is bad, because I think just about anyone can and should capitalize on everything they can; what I meant was, not everyone can capitalize on what Cody could. Is that her fault? Of course not. But it’s not theirs, either. My only point was: a lot of people try it. Cody’s story is an exception. Just like Spielberg’s is an exception (he snuck onto Paramount’s lot to get his start). The difference is that Spielberg doesn’t belittle the people who criticize him, or claim that he’s better than they are.

And with this, I’ve devoted way too much time, energy, and thought to Cody, her work, her arse, and the various implements she may or may not insert therein. I hope not to contemplate it further without visual assistance.

I say good day to you.

“I’d argue it’s a cheap joke more so than a cheap shot, but what do I know, I’m a sexist douchebag who speaks in code, apparently, and believe girls who are successful must have shaken their tits to the top, because they simply can’t have actually, you know, deserved it.”

I don’t understand the “sexist douchebag” comment; you seem to have an actual viewpoint you are trying to convey, that comment has this everyone-around-me-is-unreasonable-and-insults-me vibe that gives off seems like a really knee-jerk defensive thing.

I’ve never read anything she’s written. I have yet to see Juno, though I would like to- just haven’t had the chance yet. I’m also a writer that’s trying to “make it” in the industry. I have nothing against Cody or what she did before “making it”. I’m happy for her and her success because it give me a bit of hope that I might break into the industry too in the future. All that said I think the comment was funny as hell and if she, or anyone else, can’t take people poking fun at that kind of thing then its being taken way too seriously. Like MGK said, it’s one thing if the intent is obviously trying to imply “she cheated”. It’s another if it’s just a joke, as this clearly was, on a web site that was practically built on the same type of humor. So let’s follow the example of Cody, remove the various things up our asses, and lighten up a bit. :-p

Also, I wonder about the very idea of a dildo in the arse being a ‘shot.’ Nothing wrong with a dildo in the arse. Have you ever tried it? I’ve heard a lot of people, men and women alike, quite enjoy the sensation, especially if it vibrates.

Didn’t think so. Just checking.

It’s called humor, which is all I took it for. If it seems out of place compared to the tone of the rest of his post, then isn’t it more likely the obvious “humor” aspect was the intended meaning as opposed to spite? I only mention it because it happened to me as well in a separate topic, where I was just being funny and someone kept taking it as me trying to be defensive and spiteful. Considering the site and the sense of humor of MGK, I just find this type of reaction as kinda funny.

The fact that tons of other people try it all the time is basically her point. It’s a lot easier to begrudge someone their success if they weren’t competing against anybody. (Also, saying “No one on the corner have swagger like us” is a lot more impressive on a crowded corner.)

As for the whole line of argument about unrealistic dialogue, that’s a complaint I can never understand. It strikes me as absurd that people will make comments about ‘unrealistic’ dialogue in Juno or say things like ‘people don’t talk like that’ when referring to something by Joss Whedon or Taratino as that is completely missing the point. Did any of us actually know anybody in high school that were as consistently quick-witted as the characters in Buffy? Really unlikely, and a truly accurate depiction of dialogue at that age would at best add nothing to the scripts and more than likely seem awkward and repetitive. As it is, the dialogue reinforces the tone and theme of the show or film and is (to whatever degree) entertaining in its own right.

“I’m sure Cody worked her ass off just as soon as she removed the dildo from it”
Not to ‘defend’ Cody or something (because adults shouldn’t need it), but it seems as though you’re playing this comment for something other than articulating your point of view. I wouldn’t mention it except that it’s a rather stark comparison to the rest of your comment, which doesn’t have the tone of spite that this seems to.

“I just kind of think “you try it” is a silly thing for her to be saying, because so many people have and do.”
I think the only way that it would be silly is if it was some sort of broadside attack on anyone questioning her, which it clearly wasn’t. It was a response to a very specific thing and removing or modifying that context is -intentionally or not- deceptive.

Additionally; in my limited experience, no matter what the field, people who really love and are confidant in what they are doing aren’t going to be phased at all by what other people say *to their face*, much less write on a myspace post that doesn’t mention them, so i question who you think needs to be spoken for.

@Evan: Vanity presses require authors to pay to use their publishing services, and Lulu.com does not. Which I only point out to note that there’s a difference between self-publishing and vanity-press publishing, though I do say thanks for pointing out that fairness.

Quite frankly, in fact, it rather surprised me to encounter the sentiment at all on a site so often devoted to the comics industry, where what I did is fairly commonplace. I mean, it’s basically what Jeff Smith did with Bone, isn’t it, and didn’t Alan Moore found America’s Best Comics mainly to publish comics written by Alan Moore?

No, this is too easy, and I like this blog’s proprietor.

I don’t really think there is a way to cheat into the showbiz industry. I lived in West Hollywood for two years, and it’s not like opportunities never arose. But after I wrote my first screenplay and a half, I began to realize that I wasn’t actually all that interested in screenwriting and gave it mostly up. I’ll stick with novels and fiction, thanks much.

I really don’t think Cody did get lucky, mainly because I don’t believe in luck. Was it Franklin who said that he found the amount of luck he encountered in life was directly proportional to the amount of hard work he did? I’m sure Cody worked her ass off just as soon as she removed the dildo from it, and I would say fair play to her if I thought ‘fair’ was a term that could be applied to such things. But I don’t think it is, because it’s one of those places where all is, in fact, fair.

I’ve not seen Juno because it doesn’t seem like my kind of movies (I like my teen-oriented/-related movies to be written by Jessica Bendinger [Stick It! ftw!]). I’m not saying she’s a one-trick pony; so far she’s only got the one trick as it is, but it sounds like she’s working on a lot of other stuff, and only time will ever really determine that. I’m not even saying I think she got any gig by shaking her boobs. I wish her all the best and hope she continues to find success. I just kind of think “you try it” is a silly thing for her to be saying, because so many people have and do.

And for the record, Amy, I actually did quit my dayjob. In favor of harder work I love. When I leapt, I drove 3,000 miles to move across the country to a place I’d never been. Not saying it was courageous, mind you, but it was, at the time, certainly something I thought I had to do, and so I did it.