I’m impressed: he’s amazingly intelligent and eloquent when provided a stupid question or assertion from which to work, and he only swears twice. I would have trouble stopping at a dozen swears, honestly.

Oh my god look at this shit.

I think my favorite bit is where he asserts that “Libertarianism is where young adults live and breathe“, partially because it sounds like a shampoo commercial and partially because it’s so fucking stupid given that every bit of polling available shows that young adults in the United States can overwhelmingly be described as Keynesian liberals.

NO WAIT it’s the bit where he says “ I would raid Reason Magazine, Liberty Magazine, and the CATO Institute for news editors” – NO WAIT it’s when he says he would pay whatever is necessary to get Charles Krauthammer on his network – NO WAIT it’s this bit. “However, due to CNN then leaning libertarian, I would prohibit consideration of any bid that offered tax money to try lure CNN to a city. Instead, I would encourage city leaders to get their state and local governments to give CNN and its employees tax breaks…” Because tax breaks are nothing at all like government expenditures when it comes to a bottom line!

HE’S A 45-YEAR-OLD MARKETER, YOU GUYS!!!!!!