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mygif

Commando is boring and shitty? I don’t want to live in your world any more.

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mygif

“And Tom Cruise, while working on that movie, would walk around in character (according to my dad according to that instructor), with that ego,”

are you sure he was walking around in character, and not just as Tom Cruise?

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mygif

I’d say Twins should be replaced by the ’89 Batman; Twins was kinda lame, but Batman was the signal to Hollywood that big names, huge ad campaigns, and a hot property could substitute for a good movie instead of promoting one. The line of descent through to G.I. Joe runs through Nicholson’s Joker.

And I have to disagree, Prankster. The fanboys who love the ’89 Batman love it because it’s so much more serious than Adam West’s Batman and it shows that they totally get that he’s the Dark Knight and it doesn’t have Robin in it because he is Teh Lame Kid Sidekick and it doesn’t have puns and Tim Burton Really Gets It.

Whereas those of us who dislike it point out that once you set that aside, it’s Michael Keaton standing there in an inflexible rubber suit and occasionally sticking his fist out very slowly so people can run into it. It features a Batman who is neither a detective nor a martial artist, and a Joker who’s 100 pounds overweight and is really just Jack Nicholson playing the same damn part he plays in every other movie.

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mygif

I like Christmas Vacation.

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mygif

“It’s a parody of 80s action movies and doesn’t realize it.”

Wrong. You’re so very wrong. I’m pretty sure it realizes it and fully embraces it.

Commando may have aged (well or unwell), but it’s never boring and shitty.

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Elasticlad said on October 1st, 2009 at 10:05 am

Compared to some of the other ‘classics’ that are run ad nauseum during the holidays, Christmas Vacation is one of those rare movies I can watch again and again and not get tired of it.

And apologies to all my fellow Canadians, but Strange Brew just isn’t funny, no matter how much we want it to be.

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mygif

I love Top Gun and Christmas Vacation, and you can’t change my mind.

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mygif

You don’t like Commando? I wasn’t aware that was possible for a human who hasn’t experienced the menopause.

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mygif

I would have thought the first ‘SNL’ movie was Blues Brothers, and they’ve been trying to do that again ever since.

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mygif

Hey, Krull is great! I just started rewatching it for the first time in years. I was enjoying it on both an honest and an ironic level. It’s never going to not be cheesy. It’s always going to be grainy with an 80s aesthetic, but it’s honest and does well with it’s massive aims.

On the other hand, Neverending Story was *PAINFUL* on rewatch. I felt embarrassed for it.

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mygif

“And I have to disagree, Prankster. The fanboys who love the ‘89 Batman love it because it’s so much more serious than Adam West’s Batman and it shows that they totally get that he’s the Dark Knight and it doesn’t have Robin in it because he is Teh Lame Kid Sidekick and it doesn’t have puns and Tim Burton Really Gets It.

Whereas those of us who dislike it point out that once you set that aside, it’s Michael Keaton standing there in an inflexible rubber suit and occasionally sticking his fist out very slowly so people can run into it. It features a Batman who is neither a detective nor a martial artist, and a Joker who’s 100 pounds overweight and is really just Jack Nicholson playing the same damn part he plays in every other movie.”

I would actually have to agree with the second part, to an extent. The ’89 Batman isn’t without it’s flaws.

But the first paragraph? I think there are other reasons to like it. Burton’s Gotham was the best outside of Bruce Timm, a great blend of Gothic, modern, and gangster chic. The score by Danny Elfman was wonderful. Even playing his stock character, Nicholson works great as the Joker (I’d argue better than what they did in “The Dark Knight”). And there are great setpieces in the movie.

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mygif

I call bullshit. Not the list, but the claim that Jeffrey Tambor was once young. EVERYONE knows that he came into the world fully-formed at the age of 55.

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mygif

Danny Elfman’s score for Batman was good. Arguably, it was less good when I heard it again for the Flash TV series and then yet again for Army of Darkness and then yet again again for Batman Returns, but it was good. 🙂

And yes, the set design is wonderful, and emblematic of what I’m talking about; fans liked it not so much because of what it was, as what it wasn’t. They were all so freaked out about the possibility of a reprise of Adam West’s campy Batman TV show that simply seeing the atmospheric, gothic Gotham and a Joker who killed people felt like Heaven. But looking back (and really more in comparison to Batman: The Animated Series than TDK), it hasn’t aged well.

Which is what the list is about.

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mygif

BATMAN is a good movie, but structurally and plot-wise it feels a bit like a first draft. Kinda messy.

BATMAN RETURNS isn’t exactly elegantly plotted, but it’s so wonderfully insane and savage that it doesn’t matter.

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mygif

Anyone who thinks back to the Flashdance soundtrack and can’t come up with Maniac must not be old enough to actually remember the 1980’s.

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mygif

The Big Chill only exists because of Return of the Secaucus Seven.

Which no one saw….

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Polar Bear said on October 4th, 2009 at 2:32 pm

I wasn’t even born when most of these movies came out and even I know it’d be quicker to make a list of 80’s movies that have aged well than a list of those that have aged badly.

This being said: yes, Top Gun didn’t age well at all BUT that’s what makes it awesome. It’s like someone put all the best and worst of the 80’s in one single movie so future generation could discover Tom Cruise, bad pop, horrible fashion, black and white morality, the cold war during the Reagan years and of course gay subtext.

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ashtoreth said on October 4th, 2009 at 9:38 pm

I take issue with this list, because half of it was crappy from the get go.

And Strange Brew is a cult classic, meant to be watched while drunk or stoned.

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mygif

@Polar Bear: well said. Top Gun is so steadfastly of its time, it still works on a cheesy level.

I still enjoyed Strange Brew when I saw it 9 years ago (in a theatre no less); but were the last 9 years just too much for it I wonder…

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mygif

I feel I must speak in defense of Top Gun, because it is a groundbreaking entry in gay cinema. I’ve read it joked about in the comments, but perhaps your readers aren’t aware of the in-depth analysis Q. Tarantino offered in the 1994 visual document Sleep With Me.
Top Gun, like no film before, transferred the inner struggle of the latent homosexual into a metaphor consumable by the general audience. By utilizing the tropes of the Simpson-Bruckheimer action template, the filmmakers communicated the closeted homosexual’s struggle to be honest with his world to a larger audience than the world realized. Perhaps, in consideration of these facts, we can re-examine a bloated recycling of a well-worn Hollywood formula, and recognize it for the subversive masterpiece it is.
If that was too long winded, just google “Top Gun Tarantino” and watch the video clip yourself. It’s funking hilarious.

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mygif

I think that, if that’s how you feel about Christmas Vacation, you’re kinda missing the point.

The creepy grins are supposed to be him getting more and more stressed about the whole situation, it isn’t just weird mugging.

Also, you can think the jokes are horribly staged, but everything that happened in that movie (until the ending with the kidnapping) is grounded in reality. I know this because my family has gone through all of the stuff Clark went through on a lesser scale over the years.

Point: I still watch it every year, and I still genuinely laugh at it.

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