In the post two thousand MGK will thank all his readers for reading, or for looking at the pretty pictures if they cannot read, but the latter category will not be able to read the thanks and therefore feel resentful, except that they will not because they didn’t even know they were being thanked!
In the post two thousand commenters will again discuss their conspiracy theories about Flapjacks, but none of these theories will involve waffles – which is precisely his cunning plan!
In the post two thousand MGK will be all “thanks for reading even though now I work full-time and cannot devote four thousand words to Spider-Man on such a regular basis,” and then half his readership will go read Chris Sims instead!
In the post two thousand MGK will subtly mention that he is looking for new artists to collaborate with for ongoing projects, and then reiterate the fact that these positions are unpaid so as to not have the confusion that went on with some people last time!
In the post two thousand somebody will complain about all the So You Think You Can Dance posts, then somebody else will be all “well you don’t have to read everything,” and a huge flamewar will commence that will become internet genocide!
In the post two thousand MGK will quietly gloss over the fact that, although the vast bulk of the two thousand posts were his, other people wrote some of them when he was busy and stuff!
In the post two thousand people will wonder if we shouldn’t have waited for the 2500-post anniversary instead!
In the post two thousand somebody will say “and here’s to two thousand more,” but then they’ll think “well, that’s only four thousand, and nobody cares about four thousand,” so they will quickly say “no, wait, here’s to reaching five thousand instead” and then they’ll feel uncool!
(But seriously: it has been a blast, and here’s to… a bunch more.)
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23 users responded in this post
I’d read a post about SYTYCD if Flapjacks wrote it.
This basically guarantees that all Flapjack related conspiracies will involve waffles from now on. Probably according to Flapjack’s plan. Until he changes his mind and wants conspiracy theories without waffles.
I suppose you could say I’m…
waffling around the subject.
Yeaaaaah!
Also, here’s to 9,000 posts so I can make an OVER 9000 joke.
Two thousand posts and you’re still not writing LSH? I think the internet isn’t working right anymore.
Two thousand is a lot of posts, it’s kind of intimidating for new readers. When are you going to relaunch the blog with a new number one post?
2000 posts and still no flying car.
So Flapjacks (and by extension MGK) is actually from Belgium and wants tries to hide it by overcompensating?
This is clearly the perfect opportunity i could have been given for me to complain about those pesky SYTYCD posts.
Consider them complain’d.
You should have waited for the post 2525.
If the Internet was still alive.
If Flapjacks could survive.
😉
2000 posts and no kittens. Fuck the internet, man.
Here’s to eight thousand more!
I could really go for some waffles…
…wait, you’re Canadian, so this must all be a conspiracy to make me eat more maple syrup! You fiend! I WILL DEFY YOUR SYRUPY GOODNESS YET!
What’s wrong with 4,000 posts and how DOES someone get syrup from a pancake, anyway?
In lieu of trying to think of something clever, I’ll just say “Thank you, sir” for consistently being an one of the most enjoyable parts of my internet day.
Pancakes?
Let me guess, you’re looking for artists to illustrate post 2500 so that you can finally communicate your thanks to your illiterate readers for their lack of outrage over SYTYCD posts (which outrage they lack precisely because they are illiterate and thus cannot read the SYTYCD posts).
It’s not a conspiracy! Flapjacks is a half cyborg/ half clone from an alternate future who was sent here to keep MGK from writing the Dr. Strange stories that will eventually change the entire world for the better. Flapjacks feeds MGK drugged waffles and then turns on SYTYCD.
May all your post-‘Post 2000’ posts be…nifty.
I just like how even the acronym for SYTYCD (never mind SYTYCDC) is as long or longer than the full titles of many other shows (Castle, LOST, House, Monk, COPS, Chase…)
[There’s a headline in there somewhere… House Cops Chase Lost Castle Monk?]
“In the post two thousand MGK will be all “thanks for reading even though now I work full-time and cannot devote four thousand words to Spider-Man on such a regular basis,” and then half his readership will go read Chris Sims instead!”
I am afraid I do not understand the reference.
KenB3, are you saying you are unfamiliar with the with the work of the Internet’s foremost Batmanologist?
It’d be funnier as “Monk House Cops Chase Lost Castle”
I guess I’d read Chris Sims, I just didn’t see a direct correlation. Like I can read MGK and Chris, they are not competing morning radio shows where I can only listen to one.
YOU CAN ONLY LISTEN TO ONE