5

Jul

How To Choose A Class In Team Fortress 2

Posted by   Published in Bad Comedy, Gaming, Photoshopp'd


Click on thumb to see full

Given that TF2 is now free to play, this seemed necessary.

Share on TwitterPin it on PinterestShare on TumblrSubmit to StumbleUpon/images/tf2-flowchart-thumb.jpgDigg ThisSubmit to redditShare via email

Related Articles

26 users responded in this post

Subscribe to this post comment rss or trackback url
mygif
lance lunchmeat said on July 5th, 2011 at 10:15 am

Power Pyros 4ever

ReplyReply
mygif
01d55 said on July 5th, 2011 at 10:34 am

A parabola is a set of points that are equidistant from a point and a line. If the sentence in the chart means anything, it means a circle.

ReplyReply
mygif
wyrmsine said on July 5th, 2011 at 10:38 am

… yeah, that’s about right.

Best part of being a Pyro? Being called “W+M1” epithet after airblasting a crit rocket back into a throng of attackers.

Best part of being a Medic? Overwhelmed in sudden death overtime, alltalk=on, and hearing “There’s only two medics left, let’s rush ’em!” Mua-ha-ha-ha-ha!

ReplyReply
mygif
Kate the Short said on July 5th, 2011 at 11:20 am

What 01d55 said. CIRCLES 4 LYFE!!!1!

*ahem*

Otherwise? *hee*

ReplyReply
mygif
Polychrome said on July 5th, 2011 at 2:02 pm

Minecraft is an FPS if you have a bow.

ReplyReply
mygif
Tales to Enrage said on July 5th, 2011 at 2:02 pm

Do you like to play a class when there are way too many of that class on your team already? Sniper or Spy! They’ll never push that bomb when there are 7 spies stabbing them, or 6 Snipers all trying to use the exact same nest point!

ReplyReply
mygif
Mitchell Hundred said on July 5th, 2011 at 2:30 pm

Actually, a parabola is the thing that keeps you dry in the rain. Parabola is just the French name for it.

ReplyReply
mygif
Sbloyd said on July 5th, 2011 at 2:31 pm

Other classes are all babies!

ReplyReply
mygif
JT said on July 5th, 2011 at 3:00 pm

An equation where all points are equidistant from the center is called a ‘circle’. A parabola contains all point equidistant from the focus and the line which is perpendicular to the tangent of the vertex and located the same distance from the vertex as the focus.

There seems to be no option on the flow chart for those who actually do know what a parabola is.

ReplyReply
mygif
wundabar said on July 5th, 2011 at 3:03 pm

I, too, would like to talk about how this chart that helps you pick an imaginary man to shoot people in a video game got the definition of “parabola” wrong!

ReplyReply
mygif
Carlos Futino said on July 5th, 2011 at 3:08 pm

No fun… everybody already corrected the parabola thing. 🙂

More on topic: What’s TF2? Is it online?

ReplyReply
mygif
MGK said on July 5th, 2011 at 3:09 pm

More on topic: What’s TF2? Is it online?

It is popular accounting software. You can download it and do accounting things.

ReplyReply
mygif
Tales to Enrage said on July 5th, 2011 at 3:56 pm

You could read TF2 as an account simulation. Engineers create tax shelters, slush funds and diversionary accounts, spies expose these to reduce their effectiveness (but engineers can reconceal them to repair them). Demomen use sudden stock swings to launch themselves ahead of competitors (with some damage to their capital base as a result) and to blow others out of the water. Medics heal by tax breaks and spending cuts. Yes, Tax Fortress 2 is fun for all ages!

As Heavy Accountant Guy might say, “I AM AUUUDIT PROOOOF!”

ReplyReply
mygif
Moleman said on July 5th, 2011 at 9:41 pm

More seriously, it is the undisputed leader in online war-themed hat simulators.

ReplyReply
mygif
icechen1 said on July 5th, 2011 at 11:43 pm

Nice chart, could do with better lines though, my eyes will thank you!

ReplyReply
mygif
ThatNickGuy said on July 6th, 2011 at 12:41 am

Not enough silly hats.

ReplyReply
mygif
prefect said on July 6th, 2011 at 8:03 am

How about if you have a superhuman ability to get lost while playing FPSs? Or should I go back to Sid Meier games?

ReplyReply
mygif
Carlos Futino said on July 6th, 2011 at 8:09 am

It is popular accounting software. You can download it and do accounting things

I might have phrased my doubts wrong. I’ll rehprase it:

What kind of game is TF2? Is it a MMORPG with a continuing history for your character or is it more like Counter Strike where each game is independent?

ReplyReply
mygif
Sbloyd said on July 6th, 2011 at 9:08 am

Carlos: Some of both. It’s like CS where each game is independent, however there is an item discovery and crafting system that lets you equip yourself with other-than-standard gear (like swapping out your chaingun for one that does less damage, but has a slowing effect on those who are hit by it) and cosmetic changes (hats!).

ReplyReply
mygif
Sbloyd said on July 6th, 2011 at 9:10 am

Oh, and I should have clarified: your inventory of these items is persistent, so you can take them from game to game and server to server.

ReplyReply
mygif
FifthSurprise said on July 6th, 2011 at 9:51 am

Clearly TF2 is the best based Hat simulation game currently on the market (strong seconds include Henry Hatsworth and Final Fantasy 4 Heroes of Light). Also I think there’s a FPS minigame somewhere in there.

ReplyReply
mygif
Tom Scudder said on July 6th, 2011 at 9:22 pm

You missed out the important fact that the Heavy has all the best lines.

Go ahead. Build your tiny gun.

ReplyReply
mygif
Tales to Enrage said on July 6th, 2011 at 9:41 pm

Prefect: In that case, either play Engineer or Medic. They’re not easy, but Engineer is about building items for your team, so you get to pick one spot and stay there unless your items get destroyed. Medic ranges all over, but they stick with someone else. So you just follow that person, and either they’ll lead you to the right place, or you’ll at least be lost together.

ReplyReply
mygif
Sbloyd said on July 7th, 2011 at 8:35 am

Or, in a good-sized match, play a support pyro. When you spawn, follow an engineer to where he sets up, and stay there and light up everyone that gets close – friend or enemy. You can’t hurt friends this way, but if it’s a disguised spy, excellent! Works even better once you have the sledgehammer, so you can knock off sapper devices.

ReplyReply
mygif
Hugh said on July 10th, 2011 at 7:30 am

There’s basically no situation where a pyro is uncalled for. It’s as simple as A-B-C: Always Be Combusting.

ReplyReply
mygif
Bambi said on August 16th, 2011 at 10:10 am

Actually, that thing (in French) that keeps you dry from the rain is a parapluie. The word’s actually Greek.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apollonius_of_Perga

There. I stepped in like a total dick.

Also, this chart is seriously awesome. And Sbloyd’s advice above is pretty much the best where pyro’s concerned, anyway.

ReplyReply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Please Note: Comment moderation may be active so there is no need to resubmit your comments