Nov

STAB AT RELEVANCE PART 4: STABBA-LABBA-DING-DONG

Posted by MGK Published in Bad Comedy, Gaming, Here's A Lot Of Photoshops, Photoshopp'd, Politics

(Previously. Two. Three.)

given today’s news (October 26th, 2020)
it’s my own fault for installing WordPress (March 2nd, 2018)
Dino de Laurentiis: Prophet…or Madman? (December 2nd, 2016)
Why Marvel and I Don’t Hang Out Much Anymore: An Interview With Myself (October 24th, 2016)
Send In the Next Applicant (July 29th, 2016)

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Cyrus said on November 15th, 2011 at 9:46 am

These are great. I’ve seen the previous “sets” of political Magic cards, but I wasn’t playing Magic at the time they came out, or if I was it wasn’t with a casual group of people who follow politics. I am now though, so I’ll try to slip some into a game. I tend to be the rules expert at our table, so maybe I should put Paul Krugman into a deck. And a few others look playable and/or fun too.

Even if I don’t dare actually cast these in a real game, I should print out the Oops card for the next time someone screws up.

Jonathan said on November 15th, 2011 at 10:07 am

I don’t remember if this was said on one of the previous posts or not, but I do know these cards should be silver-bordered.

Also, the new double-faced cards need to be taken into account the next time you do one of these.

Joe X said on November 15th, 2011 at 11:12 am

That Krugman card seems a little overpowered. “I play Paul Krugman. The rules say I win, and you have to give me all your cards.”

Sigma7 said on November 15th, 2011 at 11:19 am

Jesus. I lost it at “pizzawalk” and everything from that point on was just gravy. But glorious gravy.

Kudos.

Del Coro said on November 15th, 2011 at 12:04 pm

With that gametext, Downgrade should be an Enchantment.

God, I hate myself.

Jonathan said on November 15th, 2011 at 12:18 pm

@Del Coro: Nope. An Enchantment is effective while it’s in play, while a Sorcery’s effects carry on as long as the card resolved when it played. Thus, Downgrade’s effects continue as long as Downgrade actually happened.

Cyrus said on November 15th, 2011 at 12:47 pm

Well, if they were actually going to print a card like Downgrade, yes, they would make it an enchantment and leave out the “For the rest of the game” text. (It would also probably not be black, but anyways…) As a sorcery, under current templating, it would probably read “You gain an emblem with “All spells cost an additional 1 to cast”, but regardless of the emblem formatting, making it a sorcery means that its effect can’t ever be ended during that game. They would probably avoid that.

But anyways…

Sean D. Martin said on November 15th, 2011 at 12:50 pm

Gridlock seems pretty persistent…

Jeff R. said on November 15th, 2011 at 1:20 pm

Did you really mean to make the OWS protesters Plague Rats? Heh…

Jeff R. said on November 15th, 2011 at 1:24 pm

(Actually, Relentless Rats. And to be even geekier, Downgrade would probable use the ’emblem’ quasimechanic if they wanted the effect you have written with their current templating.)

Coren said on November 15th, 2011 at 2:06 pm

Gridlock showed up twice, FYI.

These are great, but what the hell is the Koch Brothers one? I haven’t Magiced in ages, so I’ve got no idea what 4 in a shield is.

Ben said on November 15th, 2011 at 2:28 pm

Well, if we’re gonna be super-anal, the Donald card should probably say “When Donald enters play”, but who cares? 😀 The most important thing is “Pizzawalk”!

This is a feature that should just keep happening over and over. I think I’ve spent more time in my life reading and reflecting on Magic cards than ever playing them.

Sallyp said on November 15th, 2011 at 4:03 pm

This was delightful. And I don’t even know HOW to play Magic!

nemryn said on November 15th, 2011 at 4:04 pm

Coren: The Koch Brothers are a planeswalker card, which is a fairly revent card type. They come into play with four counters (as indicated by the 4 in the shield), which you can spend to play their abilities according to the numbers in the arrows. So you’d put two counters on them to play the first ability, remove one* to play the second ability, and remove twelve to play the third ability. You can only use one ability per turn, and at sorcery speed. Planeswalkers can be attacked or dealt damage as if they were players, which removes that many counters, and they die when they lose all their counters.

*Or add one? I’m not sure if ‘+-1’ is a typo or a joke I’m not getting.

Brad said on November 15th, 2011 at 4:10 pm

Miss Warren would probably appreciate being given a power or at least toughness attribute.

Phlip said on November 15th, 2011 at 5:16 pm

I think the “+-1” is a joke about doublespeak? You take a counter off, but you call it “adding” anyway…

Jonathan said on November 15th, 2011 at 8:15 pm

With the Innistrad block’s graveyard focus, it would be all too easy to get Not Mitt Romney on the battlefield.

Mecha Velma said on November 15th, 2011 at 10:39 pm

What no Artifact card for Osama Bin Laden’s corpse?

Sean D. Martin said on November 16th, 2011 at 2:06 pm

I think the “+-1″ is a joke about doublespeak? You take a counter off, but you call it “adding” anyway…

It’s all a joke.