I just found this comment added to an incredibly old thread (link removed):
“Debora said on August 10th, 2013 at 1:14 pm
If i could possibly clone myself ten times the will perform all other Search-engine Optimization business I require by hand.
I can’t therefore I exploit Ultimate Demon in place
my homepage: freelance blogging delhi (Debora)”
I want to frame this. I want to develop it into a screenplay, about a mad computer programmer who becomes obsessed with developing the perfect software for optimizing her search-engine. “No, it’s not fast enough. “It’s not good enough!” she rants to her assistant. “1.6 million results in .30 seconds? What if they need one result, and only one? We need a search-engine that can know–truly know–what the searcher wants! We need the Telepathic Master Engine! And I will code it!”
And in Act Two, she realizes that she simply can’t code it by herself. She needs someone as intelligent as her to collaborate with, someone who can truly understand all her revolutionary ideas about search-engine creation. So she instead begins work on human cloning technology, planning to create an army of Deboras to work in parallel and create her infinitely powerful search-engine optimizer in a fraction of the time!
Then finally, in Act Three, she’s been abandoned by her assistant. Her love interest has told her that he loves her, but he can’t watch her tear herself apart with this obsession. She’s finally realized that she can no more clone herself ten times than she can perform all the search-engine optimization business that she requires by hand. So instead, she turns to the last resort of the mad. She kidnaps thirteen infants and prepares to summon and exploit the Ultimate Demon. With the power of the occult backing her computers, she will create the perfect search engine. She will optimize and organize the Internet! All human knowledge will bow to her command!
I haven’t figured out how it ends yet, but I think that it has something to do with the assistant challenging her Ultimate Demon to find a single specific piece of lesbian porn and failing. But we might have to change that to get a PG-13.
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Eh, what the hell…I’m in.
Clearly the starting role must go to Debra McMichael. now (Marshall) formerly of WWE.
The perfect ending for P13, the love interest who is a hacker of challengers her to find his real name, and she fails, because he was using his real name THE WHOLE TIME! Probably because his parents named him something ridiculous because they were hippies or LARPers or actors. Like Lunar Landscape, or Pineapple Freshbreeze, or Lord Montebank Van Oslo.
I’m pretty sure the story ends with Bob Howard bursting in and stopping her. Whether she goes on to a career in Computational Demonology working for the Laundry or goes out in a blaze of glory is entirely up to her.
Are we talking Bollywood musical?
I will only watch this if it is performed entirely in Esperanto.
Periodically, when I’m in and happen to see a commenter on the list below who’s commented on an old post that looks spammish… it is spammish. I get plenty of them in my blog too, asking to let me allow them guest blog. There’s a handy way to lose my members, having a spammer show up hawking kitchen cupboards, handbags, or escort agencies in Oslo and Dubai.
There’s a SEO software called Ultimate Demon? And people say I’m crazy when I say SEO professionals are evil and they know it…
She DOES clone herself. And then all the clones fight. In the end, only one survives. But is it the original? Or the clone?
Also, like all clone stories, it is full of regret.
Wait, are we using the Ultimate Demon to do SEO? I thought we were using the Ultimate Demon to make the clones to do the SEO, which I think is much opportune for further hijinks.
Or even better, she is trying to ask the Ultimate Demon for SEO by explaining all that she’s gone through already, which the Ultimate Demon takes as an opportunity to pull some monkey’s paw shit and gives her the clones instead, but they’re also clones of varying quality!
Now Debora has to still get to her date with Mr Right on time while dealing with her wacky clone antics and simultaneously avoiding getting skinned by the Ultimate Demon’s puzzle box / Phantasm spheres / etc.