Some of the choicer bits:
I have not seen the movie so I can’t really comment to whether it’s an “evil” or “dangerous” “piece of shit “or not. The reason I haven’t seen the movie is because I am not eight years old. I am an adult and don’t see children’s movies. I haven’t ever seen “Curious George”, “She’s the Man”, or the “Dr. Doolittle” movies that I worked on for the same reason. I never saw “School for Scoundrels” either but that’s just ’cause it looked like it was gonna suck.
They could have offered the part to Anthony Clark or Jim Breuer or Dat Phan, but then they wouldn’t be able to balance out the empty void that Jason Lee brings to the film.
I asked the owner if he’d take some of my credibility as payment. He looked at me as if I was an alien with A.I.D.S. speaking some intergalactic gobbledy-goo. I had to patiently explain to this country bumpkin about my indie hipster cred, and I would now like to cash it in. This rural rube was so backwards and ignorant that he couldn’t even conceive of how financial markets work and simple free market capitalism. I tried again to explain the concept of the value of “credibility” and “artistic integrity” but he refused to take it in exchange for the house.