ME: Hey, whose “Equality” brand lemonade is this?
ERIC: It’s mine.
ME: Can I have some of your off-brand pre-made lemonade?
ERIC: Take as much as you want. Please.
ME: …is it bad?
ERIC: It’s really, really sweet. As lemonade it’s terrible. As a mixer, it’s tolerable.
ADAM: I find it goes well with gin.
KAREN ((Adam’s girlfriend): Honey, you don’t like gin.
ADAM: Yes I do.
KAREN: When we started going out, I remember one time we were at your place and your roommate offered us gin and tonics and you said you don’t like gin.
ADAM: That’s right.
KAREN: What happened?
ADAM: I drank some of it later on.
ME: That’s how you can tell he’s a professional chef. He’ll try anything to sample flavours.
ADAM: Actually, I wanted to get drunk, but that works too.
ME: Incidentally, this lemonade does go rather well with the gin, but…
ME: Now that I am drinking it, I find that I have my mind on my money and my money on my mind.