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mygif

I think I’ll wait until the second run theaters before I see this train-wreck.

I hate aliens with human accents.

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mygif

Well struck, MGK. Well struck.

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mygif

I actually don’t mind aliens with human accents, in a context like the Transformers. I mean, they’re speaking English. How are they to have learned the language? Radio and television broadcasts. It makes sense to me that they’d pick up on an accent and run with it.

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mygif

The internet. You has won it.

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mygif

:-p I don’t know how many of you watched Transformers growing up, but the movie was about all you could honestly ask for.

Lots of action scenes. Exotic locations. A shout out to enertron. Cars transforming into robots and then back into cars again.

If you thought you were in line to see “Driving Miss Daisy” or even “Lord of the Rings”, you were going to the wrong movie. But the eight year old kid in me absolutely loved it.

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mygif

Needs more cocaine!

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mygif

I’m with ShortPacked! on this one? How can you honestly accuse a property that started out as a 20 minute toy commercial of “selling out”? Can it get more commercial than that?

Besides, they killed the black robot in the last movie, they had to get new ones.

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mygif

Sadly, I’ll bet this is better than the dialogue in the actual movie.

Also, MGK’s GI Joe review is gonna be gold.

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Mason: I suppose they picked up the gold bucktooth from the Internet, too?

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This fan of the giant robot franchise in question thanks you, sir.

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Lister Sage said on June 29th, 2009 at 1:02 pm

Zifnab: The eight year old kid in you has shit taste. Yes, your right about what should be and what was in the Transformers films, but how does that excues the masterbation “joke” in the first film, the pot brownies in the second, two scenes of dogs fucking in the second and something Megan Fox calls “acting”? What’s worse is that a movie, obviously intended for children, is rated PG-13. Who the fuck thought that was a good idea? I hope to God that all the kids of the parents that took those children to these movies become pot smoking, cronic masterbating, furries; just to teach those fuckers a lesson.

Exar: When it’s a movie by Michael Bay: yes. The man could right a book about selling out.

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Lister: You forgot about the two scenes of the Penis-Bot in the beginning.

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candlejack said on June 29th, 2009 at 2:15 pm

I could have done without the Constructicon scrotum, too. (Actually, I’m not even entirely sure that’s who that was with the big balls. It makes sense, but…I have a hard time telling the metal apart sometimes, as most aren’t really distinctive, and it’s also possible I was reaching the end of my attention span by that point in the movie.)

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JohnnyOso said on June 29th, 2009 at 2:32 pm

Y’know, I thought the two of them were a riff on the “Dumb Hick” stereotype.

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mygif

Audi isn’t Italian.

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The German cars as stereotypes have already been taken care of by Volkswagen’s latest ad campaign. “It’s vot zer people vant” indeed.

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ps238principal said on June 29th, 2009 at 3:27 pm

These movies were somewhat more than just toy commercials. I was under the impression that the writers were given the toys and told to make up stories based on them as they saw fit (with approval from Hasbro). There were some pretty interesting concepts and ideas floating around amongst the usual “Megatron gets a new super-weapon” tales, and even the “Beast Wars” CGI cartoons had some pretty decent sci-fi in amongst the gratuitous fight scenes.

Given that the movies only had to include giant robots that changed into vehicles and back while fighting each other, the fact that a better story couldn’t be inserted (or at least, a less embarrassing one) by Michael Bay speaks ill of his work as a director, not of the Transformers as a concept. The Marvel Comics run would have yielded better ideas than these two films have, which is a real shame.

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ps238principal said on June 29th, 2009 at 3:27 pm

* instead of “these movies,” make that, “these TV shows.”

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Lister Sage said on June 29th, 2009 at 3:53 pm

CB: I didn’t actually see the second movie, but had a friend who saw it last week explain what the worst parts were. You’d have to pay me an insane amount of money to see that piece of shit.

ps238principal: I would gladly pay to see an adaptaion of “Carwash of Doom” and that’s no were near how good the comic could be. It’s not even the strangest story the comics ever came up with either.

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mygif

Can anyone doorstop Simon Furman and ask what he thinks about M. Mudflap et M. Skids?

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mygif

MGK? I am standing and applauding you in my study right now. This is awesome.

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mygif

I’d rather see that than Bay’s shittacular “masterpiece”.

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malakim2099 said on June 29th, 2009 at 8:29 pm

Well, I did see it… and it looked like a 2-part G1 episode saturated with about an hour and a half of stupid jokes, plot contrivances, and other nitwitisms.

I think, after meditating on the matter, that’s what happened. There IS the seed of a good movie there somewhere. Unfortunately, it’s buried under an absolute tide of “Michael Bay trying to be funny” stupid shit.

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mygif

Y’know, I thought the two of them were a riff on the “Dumb Hick” stereotype.

That’s what I said in the last thread. I thought they had much more similarity to Mater from Cars (minus everything good, of course) than any Black stereotype.

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Robert N. said on June 29th, 2009 at 9:47 pm

Never seen the show or films, but I can’t stop laughing… Congrats, man.

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invisiblemoose said on June 30th, 2009 at 3:37 pm

If nobody else is going to show their nerd colours, I’d better.

Dude, that Grimlock images you used is from The War Within where he turned into some tank thingy, /not/ a T-Rex.

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mygif

Yes. Win. All of those positive tired internet memes.

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mygif

Mudflap said: “It’s not even an Italian car, for Christ’s sake.”

Mac said: “Audi isn’t Italian.”

Mac, any comment on whether or not Jeff Goldblum was actually killed by a dinosaur?

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mygif

Well, this (and the comics) make me want to run out and buy the Twins. Thank you for this, MGK. Rock on.

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mygif

God damn that movie sucked.

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mygif

Why the heck DIDN’T they put Grimlock in the new movies?

This entire franchise exists to appeal to our inner five-year-olds and when I was a kid there was nothing more awesome than a robot that turns into a robot dinosaur.

[Insert obligatory joke about young Mike Bay and fireworks]

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mygif

Because car companies aren’t manufacturing dinosaurs, I guess.

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mygif

No wonder the car companies keep going bankrupt 😉

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