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mygif

Michael Bay
The giant robots
Fights and explosions obscured
by camera movement

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Genius, MGK!
Especially Zemeckis
and Coen Brothers

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Illuyankas said on September 5th, 2010 at 2:07 pm

Uwe Boll

Oh god my poor eyes
It’s like he killed a child
And sent me the parts

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but it was worth it
sold his soul to the devil
Christopher Nolan

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Seltzer and Friedberg
are bad for America
Stop seeing their films

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Jonathan Roth said on September 5th, 2010 at 8:59 pm

Indy Director
Never before heard of you
Never will again

Joel Shumacher will
Follow Tim Burton and trash
Any thing you like

Tarantino says
Why bother to write anything
Just have swears and shots

It’s really easy to do negative ones, gotta try something else..

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mygif

F-ing brilliant.

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Chris Russell said on September 5th, 2010 at 10:11 pm

AMENABAR:
Genre pics are great
Oscar loves misery porn
Chabon in reverse

EASTWOOD:
Characters live lives
Of quiet desperation
In unsubtle films

GREENGRASS:
No Steadicam makes
Action scenes hard to follow.
Who is even fighting?

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This is awesome. I love the M. Night one – your humor, it has layers.

GUY RITCHIE:
Gritty stylized farce
narrated in Cockney slang
with Jason Statham

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The Crazed Spruce said on September 6th, 2010 at 6:32 am

DAVID CRONENBERG:
Twisted characters
You could sit and watch all day
‘Til your head explodes

PAUL GROSS:
A few good moments
Proudly Canadian, eh
Otherwise, pure tripe

STEPHEN SODERBERG:
Hollywood buddies
Get together, have fun, and make
Overrated films

MICHAEL BAY:
BANG! BANG! BOOM! POW! BANG!
BANG! BOOM! BANG! plot BANG! BOOM! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BOOM! POW! BANG!

BRIAN SINGER:
The next great artiste
Then he filmed superheroes
All downhill from there

ED WOOD:
Proof that even crap
Given mood and irony
Can entertain you

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The Crazed Spruce said on September 7th, 2010 at 2:05 am

Just thought of this one…

QUENTIN TARANTINO:
A grizly ballet
Of blood, guns, crime, monologues
And classic rock tunes

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ps238principal said on September 7th, 2010 at 2:16 am

JJ Abrams

Shakey cam lens flare
Lost still makes no sense to me
But I can’t not watch

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Mister Alex said on September 7th, 2010 at 8:54 am

QUENTIN TARANTINO

Genre characters
Search for deeper meaning in
Sexy womens’ feet

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Mister Alex said on September 7th, 2010 at 10:39 am

JOHN WOO

Driven by man-love
Bullets fly in slow-motion;
The doves fly upwards

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Mister Alex said on September 7th, 2010 at 10:41 am

ERROL MORRIS

Curious subjects
Talk directly at camera,
Revealing their selves

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Mister Alex said on September 7th, 2010 at 10:59 am

EDGAR WRIGHT

Our story be–QUICK
CUT–hilarious moment!–
Genre cleverness!

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DAVID LYNCH

Unbalanced subjects
Deeply eerie visuals
Was it all a dream?

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Matthew Johnson said on September 7th, 2010 at 12:48 pm

ORSON WELLES

Auteur of “auteur”
Squandered his talent but still
Watch “Citizen Kane”

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Matthew Johnson said on September 7th, 2010 at 1:02 pm

GEORGES MELIES

Doctor, I have a
Rocket in my eye, it hurts
To the moon, Alice!

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Matthew Johnson said on September 7th, 2010 at 1:04 pm

FRITZ LANG

Escaped to L.A.
More movies, but none as good
as “Metropolis”

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Matthew Johnson said on September 7th, 2010 at 1:06 pm

WES ANDERSON

Always cast Wilsons
Then found his perfect actors
In stop-motion dolls

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Matthew Johnson said on September 7th, 2010 at 1:10 pm

OK, I’m done. Back to work.

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WES ANDERSON:
Painfully hipster
Devolves to self-parody
I miss his first films

I can’t enjoy him anymore since the Spiderman & God of War spoofs nailed him
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5KfHEoZDKI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rylS-X0s-KM

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