In the post two thousand MGK will thank all his readers for reading, or for looking at the pretty pictures if they cannot read, but the latter category will not be able to read the thanks and therefore feel resentful, except that they will not because they didn’t even know they were being thanked!
In the post two thousand commenters will again discuss their conspiracy theories about Flapjacks, but none of these theories will involve waffles – which is precisely his cunning plan!
In the post two thousand MGK will be all “thanks for reading even though now I work full-time and cannot devote four thousand words to Spider-Man on such a regular basis,” and then half his readership will go read Chris Sims instead!
In the post two thousand MGK will subtly mention that he is looking for new artists to collaborate with for ongoing projects, and then reiterate the fact that these positions are unpaid so as to not have the confusion that went on with some people last time!
In the post two thousand somebody will complain about all the So You Think You Can Dance posts, then somebody else will be all “well you don’t have to read everything,” and a huge flamewar will commence that will become internet genocide!
In the post two thousand MGK will quietly gloss over the fact that, although the vast bulk of the two thousand posts were his, other people wrote some of them when he was busy and stuff!
In the post two thousand people will wonder if we shouldn’t have waited for the 2500-post anniversary instead!
In the post two thousand somebody will say “and here’s to two thousand more,” but then they’ll think “well, that’s only four thousand, and nobody cares about four thousand,” so they will quickly say “no, wait, here’s to reaching five thousand instead” and then they’ll feel uncool!
(But seriously: it has been a blast, and here’s to… a bunch more.)