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I just realized: do we need an alignment chart for Eddie Deezen?

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God, that man’s a chameleon.

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When I saw the title, the first thing I thought was that chaotic evil has to be Drexel Spivey from True Romance. “He must have thought it was white boy day. It ain’t white boy day, is it?”

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Bravo.

And THIS is why I’ve maintained for years that Gary Oldman is the single most versatile actor working today.

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LashLightning said on August 7th, 2012 at 11:03 am

No Jean-Baptiste Emanuel Zorg? Sir, I am offended!

Although, I don’t think you could sum up his character with a little pithy quote… And he may end up replacing Dracula or Leon, so that’s no good…

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Katrina Lehto (@LitheraPrime) said on August 7th, 2012 at 11:14 am

I’m with LashLightning here. Man, Zorg is amazing but challenging. Still, excellent work, man.

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There are character actors and there are chameleons. Both are valuable, but the former are far more common today than the latter, and Gary Oldman is probably the single greatest chameleon working in film alive.

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I vote we make “dog-fucking bored” a part of the North American lexicon.

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bryan Rasmussen said on August 7th, 2012 at 1:37 pm

I think Sid was basically Neutral Incompetent.

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William Kendall said on August 7th, 2012 at 2:12 pm

A total chameleon, and one of the best actors out there today, if not the best.

And there are roles you could have added in that are missing, like Lee Harvey Oswald or the terrorist in Air Force One….

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Alegretto said on August 7th, 2012 at 2:30 pm

Ugh. I hate that, whenever you make one of these actor alignment charts, I can’t even friggin identify like six of the respective movies/series/whathaveyou.

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@Alegretto

You do know all of these have mouseover text that tells you what the movies in question are, right?

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The Unstoppable Gravy Express said on August 7th, 2012 at 3:06 pm

Since Zorg’s plan is explicitly to create chaos for its own sake, wouldn’t that make him Chaotic Neutral?
Quote: “I know this music. Let’s change the beat.”

For the Leon quote I would have chosen “EVVVVVVERYYYYOOONNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!”

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Ed (Jack Norris) said on August 7th, 2012 at 3:54 pm

I’d probably swap in Zorg for Sid, who was a tool and a goof, and who I doubt I would have enjoyed ever meeting, but who falls short of full “evil villain” status just as much as he fell short of “actual bass player” status.

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What, no mention of Oldman’s role in Quest for Canmelot? *waits to be punched in the gut*

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This is vert nice what is the mention of Quest!

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ladypeyton said on August 7th, 2012 at 6:34 pm

When I saw the title, the first thing I thought was that chaotic evil has to be Drexel Spivey from True Romance. “He must have thought it was white boy day. It ain’t white boy day, is it?”

Wait. Isn’t chaotic evil Stansfield from Leon: The Professional? I admit it’s been a long time since I’ve seen True Romance, but that looks exactly like Stansfield.

And am I the only person that has no idea who true neutral is? (And neutral good and chaotic neutral, actually…)

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mygif

Whoo-hoo! MGK did the thing I asked for!

Someone else might’ve asked for it too; I have no idea. That won’t stop me for claiming credit.

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@Alex: The problem with the mouseover feature of the charts is that, like the footnotes, the mouseover text vanishes before I can read all the text, and can only be recovered by refreshing the page.

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Prodigal: No need to refresh, just move your pointer off the picture and back on again.

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I guess Gordon got dinged from Lawful for being willing to countenance an extralegal vigilante?

And yeah, Zorg was the gimme choice for CE. Dropped the ball there.

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duquesne_pdx said on August 7th, 2012 at 8:40 pm

“When I saw the title, the first thing I thought was that chaotic evil has to be Drexel Spivey from True Romance. “He must have thought it was white boy day. It ain’t white boy day, is it?”>/i>
I thought of Drexel for NE. Just doesn’t give a crap about anything but his money.

I expected “I take no pleasure in taking life if it’s from a person who doesn’t care about it” for Stansfield, but a great quote, nonetheless.

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duquesne_pdx said on August 7th, 2012 at 8:43 pm

Also, as long as we’re talking about ACs, I’m re-entering the request for a Firefly/Serenity AC.

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Edgar Allan Poe said on August 7th, 2012 at 10:22 pm

Where does his character from Tiptoes fall?

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[…] * The last alignment chart you’ll ever need: all Gary Oldman edition. […]

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“I’ll tell you what I do like though: a killer, a dyed-in-the-wool killer. Cold blooded, clean, methodical and thorough.”

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@The Unstoppable Gravy Express:
Not really. There’s two kinds of chaos in fiction: the “cool rebel that makes life fun while order keeps it going” chaos, and the “evil when you don’t want to say evil because it’s cliche” chaos. Fifth Element is more or less in the latter category.
What a lot of players don’t get is that Chaotic Neutral doesn’t mean “Chaotic Evil, but the paladin doesn’t get a bonus when he smites me for being a git,” nor does it mean “CHEEZMUNKY XD”. Chaotic Neutral generally means that you do what you want, and what you want isn’t really good or bad – self-centered, maybe, but rarely directly harmful.
Sorry, this kind of reminds me of the days on the old Order of the Stick forums where you had a vocal minority who insisted that Belkar, who regularly advocated genocide, slavery, and torture as solutions to problems, was really CN because he was “just amoral.”

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Alegretto said on August 8th, 2012 at 1:54 am

@Alex
Oh man, I hadn’t noticed, since I always click on the pic right away since otherwise it looks miniscule in the titan-o-tron I have for a screen. Thanks for the tip!

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Ladypeyton said on August 8th, 2012 at 10:58 am

Huh. Mouseover text. Who knew?

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Halloween Jack said on August 8th, 2012 at 3:23 pm

I would have stuck Sid Vicious in True Neutral and used Mason Verger, the sister-molesting supercreep who ate his own face from Hannibal, in Neutral Evil. Oldman is the first person that I heard the theory that Sid didn’t kill Nancy Spungen from, and in the book that Nancy’s mom wrote about her daughter, she doesn’t believe that Sid did, either. (She characterizes Sid as sweet but dim.)

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@Salmo: Doesn’t work, unfortunately – that’s why I have to refresh the page. And even then, I was only able to read four of the entries before the mouseover text vanished again.

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Dr. Creaux said on August 9th, 2012 at 8:34 am

Yay! Rosencrantz!

Dr. C

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I’d be inclined to switch CN and NE. Sid was more messed up than bad. But that’s me.

Very nice touch using a “Leon” quote that namedrops Beethoven.

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Snap Wilson said on August 10th, 2012 at 12:52 am

I keep meaning to have a full Gary Oldman filmathon running over several weekends. This is just more impetus to do it.

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Someone explain to me why Smiley is LG. Isn’t a spy, almost by definition, someone who’s willing to do bad things and break the law for the greater good of the country? That is, NG.

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Frodo Baggins said on August 11th, 2012 at 3:09 pm

How is Dracula remotely lawful?

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carnackiArdent said on September 2nd, 2013 at 1:58 am

@Frodo Baggins: I haven’t seen that particular film, but in the books Dracula is very much lawful evil – he’s a subversion of the English values at the time, but he has very strong strictures that are perfectly in line with the laws of a backwoods rural Europe stuck in the Crusades (some depictions give him rants about dealing with the Turks, IIRC). He takes great pride in ruling his people and making them prosper as long as they obey – but he rules his people with an iron fist, and, you know, steals a baby in a sack for dinner, though I think that part doesn’t make it into most movies. He’s lawful evil from the “in charge” end – he makes the laws, but he abides by them himself, and as long as he’s obeyed he’s a perfectly pleasant host.

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