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mygif

Because there is a merciful God who loves us all.

.. and war comics don’t sell that well these days.

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Because he’d put in too many heroic Brits (see Captain Britain, cancellation of).

I *like* Ennis’s war comics, but the weird wartime shit he puts into them is pretty much straight from the Top 40 list of weird wartime shit. I’d love to read Ennis’s take on the Romanian army in Stalingrad, or the China-Burma-India theater, or the Soviet roll-up of the Japanese forces on the Asian mainland.

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Because we don’t need to learn how devoted a christian Sgt Rock would become in Garth Ennis’ eyes.

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Because writing more Battler Britton stories would be better. And what he really wants is Johnny Red (http://www.falconsquadron.sevenpennynightmare.co.uk/johnnyred.htm) but that wasn’t being licenced.

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ps238principal said on September 23rd, 2009 at 9:47 am

I think I speak for everyone when I say I’d love to see Garth Ennis’ “Biggles.”

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mygif

I’d buy this book.

Especially if it had a Haunted Tank back-up feature…

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I’m holding out hope for an Ennis-penned Power Pack mini. A man can dream, can’t he?

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We don’t need to see Sgt. Rock anally fist some Nazis.

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Clearly they’re saving all their money up so they can afford YOU.

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What we really need is Garth Ennis writing Guy Gardner. With Howard Chaykin on art duties.

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holy shit. good idea.

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Because it doesn’t involve Geoff Johns killing off and/or bringing back anyone.

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Johns would end up being the co-writer (because Dan DiDio almost never says no to the guy) and he would try to use the series to make the DCU even more like the fan fiction he wrote before he turned pro. Ennis probably just doesn’t want to deal with that nonsense.

Ennis would be writing stories where one of the guys from Easy Company gets gang raped by a bunch of effete Gestapo guys who like to quote Nietzsche and then Rock slowly kills them with ordinary household items. Meanwhile, Johns would be all like, “Hey! According to All-Star Squadron, the original Atom was in the Army. He could be their new company clerk and act just like Radar on MASH! And we could use this issue to retcon in an idea I had for Tarantula and the original Liberty Belle where it turns out that the Tarantula was related on his mother’s side to the Ultra-Humanite and…”

And at that point, Garth Ennis would have to punch him in his stupid face. Which would be horrible for his career, since Johns and DiDio are practically joined at the hip.

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mygif

Because they’re still upset over what the “Tek Knight” *cough* did in The Boys?

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I think the real question is, in this hypothetical Sgt. Rock series, how would Ennis manage to work in 1) a trip to Ireland, 2) commentary on the Troubles, and 3) have the characters quote some Pogues lyrics.

I am aware that at least one of those would not have existed at the time in question. This is a minor obstacle for Ennis.

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mygif

Because no one really needs to see WW2 fetishized in yet another way?

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Well, I don’t know that it would sell tons of copies, but I’d buy it

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Because they have the Kuberts?

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Because Tarantino already made Inglorious Basterds and DC didn’t want to inadvertently provoke him and Ennis into a game of one-upmanship?

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I’d like to second the guy who requested an Ennis-penned Biggles comic. Not the sanitised version which Johns started doing after he found out he was writing kids’ books. The early Great War ace who lives on whisky and nerves, slaughters his enemies in cold blood, and has friends die on a weekly basis.

Mind you, the Phantom Eagle LS was half-way there.

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mygif

Because the point of Sgt. Rock is that it is a strictly anti-war war comic. If Ennis cold remember to write it that way (and honestly, get art and input from Joe Kubert) then by All means, let him have a crack at it.

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Because no one should be ENCOURAGING Ennis to keep writing the same damn three stories over and over again of late…

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Actually, if the series of events that Koah suggested actually happened, I’d be on that in a second. Watching those two try to out gore each other? I’m in, just to watch the spectacle of it all.

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“Because Tarantino already made Inglorious Basterds and DC didn’t want to inadvertently provoke him and Ennis into a game of one-upmanship?”

Make it so!

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Black Rabbit said on September 23rd, 2009 at 7:43 pm

War stories are Ennis’s first love, a genre he respects, as opposed to, say, superheroes. His wartime stuff is Ennis at his most restrained, and where his two worst tendencies – wallowing in either shock tactics or overweening nostalgia – will most likely be subsumed, and his greatest strengths, strong characterization and fuck-yeah dialogue, would have plenty of room to play in.

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mygif

Because Sgt. Rock doesn’t need to have a run where every other story features a German pilot who just loves to fly and wants to defend his country, yet hates Hitler and the Nazis.

Ennis loves doing that, and I don’t know why.

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mygif

The same reason why they don’t offer Gaiman crazy amounts of money for Gemworld or Marvel doesn’t offer tons of money for him to write Thor or Ghost Rider.

Or why Darwyn Cooke doesn’t get to write Martian Manhunter in the style of his noir detective stories.

Or the guys behind Godland doing All Star Fourth World.

Or…

…where was I going with this?

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The real question is… Why isn’t he writing Beetle Bailey?

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I just want to point out that his “The Night Witches” miniseries — which dealt with female Russian air force pilots in WWII — was not overrun with heroic Brits. At all.

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Hell, if I were Bill-Gates-Rich I’d pay him to write a new Punisher series as well.

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Because it means there would be a reason for me to actually go to a comic store and buy something.. But only if there were Haunted Tank stories in there too..

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and Graham.. OUT OF MY HEAD!

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What Black Rabbit said. The people who assume that an Ennis Sgt. Rock series would be like The Boys or Preacher, only with Nazis, haven’t read any of his War Stories or his Enemy Ace mini. When it comes to actual straight-on, honest war comics, Ennis can write the fuck out of them. They’re honestly better than most of his more famous work (Preacher included, Hitman not included.)

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mygif

I was just going to say, “swears,” and leave it at that (perhaps not Rock, but figure Bulldozer and Ice Cream Soldiers swear like hell) but I think maybe Ennis just doesn’t want to. Other irons in the fire, doesn’t want to rehash old stuff, wants weekends off for himself, whatever.

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mygif

Because that would create a quality comic?

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I would like to read an Ennis Jonah Hex story.

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Because nobody should be paying Ennis to write anything?

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Because DC is moving away from constantly reimaning 50+ year old characters and moving forward with new ideas.

Nah just messing with you. It’s cause DC can’t sell anyone but their big 2 characters so they’re sure as heck not gonna spend real money on a WWII comic.

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mygif

Because there is no amount of money that DC could pay Ennis that would make him come back after they tried to screw him over on The Boys.

But seriously, forget about war comics. Ennis should just get to play fast and loose with the DC Universe. He hates superheroes in general, but I’d seriously like to see the fucked-up shit he’d do with them!

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ThatNickGuy said on September 23rd, 2009 at 8:31 pm

“The same reason why they don’t offer Gaiman crazy amounts of money for Gemworld…”

DC won’t even offer Gaiman crazy amounts of money to write Sandman. According to Gaiman at Worldcon, he approached them about doing Sandman Zero, a miniseries leading up to the events of the first issue, and they offered him their standard contract and standard rates.

Beyond the fact that DC still has an amazing ability to mishandle its talent, and the fact that Sgt. Rock is a non-starter, why would Ennis want to be tied down to writing a single war comic about a single character and a single front, when instead he can do something like Battlefields, which allows him to write whatever story he wants with whatever approach he wants? He could never have done “Dear Billy” as a Sgt. Rock story.

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