May

Not Quite Improved Archie

Posted by MGK Published in Archie (Improved Or Otherwise), Comics, Interactive Fun Time Party

The Improved Archie’s Fear (May 13th, 2014)
Improved Archie: The Ragin’ Climax (April 8th, 2014)
Archie Comics: The Improved Story (March 11th, 2014)
Who’s Afraid of Improved Archie? (January 30th, 2014)
Fifty Improvements of Archie (December 3rd, 2013)

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Ryan Beariot said on May 12th, 2010 at 9:15 am

Now THAT’S how you do the hokey pokey!

Phil said on May 12th, 2010 at 9:16 am

No. I don’t think that there’s anything that could fill that word balloon that could make that image better.

chenry said on May 12th, 2010 at 9:22 am

“Now we’ll never get the combination to the safe!”

Odd King said on May 12th, 2010 at 9:30 am

Hell of a party, Arch! Have you seen my hat?

The Jeff said on May 12th, 2010 at 9:49 am

We’re in over our heads Archie, I told you not to put so many ‘ludes in the coffee!

ninjasuperspy said on May 12th, 2010 at 10:08 am

“Christ what an asshole!”

BR said on May 12th, 2010 at 10:10 am

“He set his ballsack right here. Right here. No way. Jughead don’t play. Bitch had to die.”

nate said on May 12th, 2010 at 10:46 am

When he said “Come to Europe and carry my luggage” I thought it was a free trip to France!

bunnyofdoom said on May 12th, 2010 at 11:42 am

“The Styrichine didn’t work, so now we had to drown the bastard!”

Chris Lowrance said on May 12th, 2010 at 12:08 pm

“…whilst pining one arm behind his back and holding his head under like so. HA! The game is afoot!”

Chris Lowrance said on May 12th, 2010 at 12:13 pm

or…

“Hey, it really IS harder to pat your head and rub your ass.”

Willie Everstop said on May 12th, 2010 at 12:22 pm

“Talk? …No Mr. Lodge, I expect you to die!”

“Has anyone seen my hat? Its about this big, has sharp points, and is full of my medication.”

Ben said on May 12th, 2010 at 12:23 pm

“Not again?! GOD-DAMMIT! I just cleaned that fucking pool!”

Foxhack / Kit Sniper said on May 12th, 2010 at 1:00 pm

Weekend at Mr. Lodge’s!

Mister Alex said on May 12th, 2010 at 1:27 pm

(with Iraqi accent) “That’s right, I’ve killed Dogen… and his sidekick, Lennon, too. There’s still time for you to escape the smoke monster, Arch, but… not for me.”

Joe X said on May 12th, 2010 at 1:32 pm

“I’ve had it up to HERE with cleaning up your dead bodies, Arch!”

Eli Balin said on May 12th, 2010 at 1:38 pm

“Your process for creating vat-grown supersoldiers is…disappointing, Mr. Andrews. Your funding is canceled.”

Quixim said on May 12th, 2010 at 1:42 pm

Now that you’ve killed her father, there’s NOTHING stopping you from marrying Veronica now!

SmR said on May 12th, 2010 at 1:55 pm

Yeah, agreed- I don’t think there’s any improving this image. What the eff? And this is how the comic ENDS?

Sage Freehaven said on May 12th, 2010 at 1:56 pm

Hello, Archie. I want to play a game…

Thousand Sons said on May 12th, 2010 at 2:31 pm

“Disrespect the crown, yo bitch ass will drown.”

Craig Oxbrow said on May 12th, 2010 at 2:57 pm

“This is his Aquaman impression or something. Goes right over my head.”

Benjamin said on May 12th, 2010 at 3:14 pm

“Bitch took my hat.”

CB said on May 12th, 2010 at 3:27 pm

“I said ‘sleep with the fishes’ not ‘throw him in my pool'”

tinpantithesis said on May 12th, 2010 at 3:47 pm

“He must have felt that he had lost the old warm world, paid a high price for living too long with a single dream. He must have looked up at an unfamiliar sky through frightening leaves and shivered as he found what a grotesque thing a rose is and how raw the sunlight was upon the scarcely created grass. A new world, material without being real, where poor ghosts, breathing dreams like air, drifted fortuitously about…like that ashen, fantastic figure gliding toward him through the amorphous trees.”

Illuyankas said on May 12th, 2010 at 5:26 pm

Pool party, young man, old lecher… I saw where this was going, but the last straw was asking if I liked Michael Barrymore.

Gavok said on May 12th, 2010 at 6:53 pm

“Mr. Lodge drowned, my hand is glued to my ass, Reggie’s raping you from off-panel and NOW you’re spilling the drinks too?! Seriously?! Come on!”

Brad Hanon said on May 12th, 2010 at 9:28 pm

Jesus, Arch, I have to do EVERYTHING for you, don’t I?

Magic Love Hose said on May 12th, 2010 at 9:53 pm

“I once drowned a man THIS BIG!”

Jason said on May 12th, 2010 at 10:01 pm

“Wow, he took the death of [DC Character that died today] pretty damn hard, Arch.”

Joe England said on May 12th, 2010 at 11:17 pm

“No, I’m a MONKEY! Geez Mr. Lodge, you suck at charades.”

KDBryan said on May 13th, 2010 at 6:46 am

“Hello? Mr. Lodge? I pulled the trigger with my eyes closed, just like you said but I think it might have been loaded by mistake and I’m kinda freakin’ out here!

. . . Hello?

Can I- can I at least open my eyes yet? Please? And, hey, what did you mean by ‘just like Sunset Boulevard?’ Is that where you grew up or something?

. . . Mr. Lodge? Hello? Seriously, are you still there? I want my five million dollars now!”

J.H. said on May 13th, 2010 at 8:08 am

This is begging for a CSI Miami opening parody…

YEEEEEAAAAAH~!

Benjamin said on May 13th, 2010 at 9:38 am

“…sodomized me with my own hat. No, Archie, don’t clean it up. Let the blood stain the deck. As a reminder.”

August J. Pollak said on May 13th, 2010 at 12:14 pm

“…polo!”

Evil Midnight Lurker said on May 13th, 2010 at 3:24 pm

“He was an SP, Arch. The tech don’t lie.”

Justin Newberry said on May 13th, 2010 at 4:09 pm

… and then the water nymph will be claimed by the sky spirit, while you act as the protector, and the twist is that there are no twists!

Carter said on May 13th, 2010 at 5:00 pm

“Do you need more any proof that Ronnie comes from the Innsmouth branch of the family?”

equinox216 said on May 14th, 2010 at 9:09 am

“Yes, Arch, my charades was Chuck Palahniuk’s ‘Guts’. Kinda hard to do a ‘sounds like’ for that one. … So who’s next?”

Zed Alpha said on May 14th, 2010 at 8:20 pm

FUCK YOU, OLD MAN!

Piranhtachew said on May 14th, 2010 at 9:22 pm

“Look, Arch, When we do the ‘breathing underwater’ joke again; Have the glasses *ready*…”

gaygeek said on May 14th, 2010 at 10:40 pm

I am free. FREE. Free from that wretched containment device you laughing called a ‘hat’!Lodge was the first but not the last! Now starts the reign of DARK JUGHEAD. All bow before me. NOW.

sgt pepper said on May 14th, 2010 at 11:06 pm

“One word, Mr Lodge: plastics.”

Greg Morrow said on May 17th, 2010 at 3:24 pm

Camels and needles, rich man. Where is your Heaven?

UnSub said on May 18th, 2010 at 10:25 pm

Worst. Aquaman. Impression. EVAH.

_or_

Although this death was purely accidental, we have to cover it up Archie. It’s the only way. And then I’m sure this will be the last we ever hear of it.

Keogh said on May 31st, 2010 at 5:38 pm

“Archie, I’ve killed the one guy you wanted dead. You have to kill someone I want dead.

Archie, I want you to kill Betty.”

Keogh said on May 31st, 2010 at 5:39 pm

“Hey, the pool’s freezing over early this year. Maybe we can go ska… wait, why is Mr. Lodge’s rotting corpse down there?”

Keogh said on May 31st, 2010 at 5:40 pm

“We both know who did this, Archie. Tell me where Betty is.”

Not Quite Improved Archie

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