We saw your wang
We saw your wang
In the movie that we saw, we saw your wang
We saw Kevin Bacon’s wang in Wild Things,
and Rich Gere’s in American Gigolo,
and Jason Segel’s wang in Sarah Marshall,
but not erect, cause that’s a big no-no
(unless it’s porn)
We saw Michael Pitt’s wang in The Dreamers,
Gael Bernal’s in Y Tu Mama Tambien,
Peter Saarsgard’s in Kinsey,
Geoff Rush’ in Quills, but see:
We’ll never see Leonardo DiCaprio’s thing
(unless Scorcese asks)
We saw your wang
We saw your wang
In the movie that we saw, we saw your wang
We saw Zach Galifikanis’ in The Hangover,
Tom Hardy’s wang in Bronson took first place;
We saw Robin Williams’ in The Fisher King
And Seth MacFarlane’s whenever we see his face
Billy Crudup’s “Watchmen” wang? Computers;
But Fassbender’s Shame wang was for real,
And Jude Law in The Talented Mr. Ripley,
And Vincent Gallo in The Brown Bunny,
And Ewan McGregor in Trainspotting,
and The Pillow Book, and Velvet Goldmine,
and Young Adam, and Perfect Sense,
and really you have to pay him extra to keep his pants on
We saw your wang
We saw your wang
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36 users responded in this post
No Viggo and “Eastern Promises”?
DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MANY SYLLABLES THERE ARE IN “VIGGO MORTENSEN” FOR CRISSAKE
5?
Oh and Sam Rockwell. I’ve been exposed to his wang in a couple movies as well…
Harvey Keitel tends to let his wang hang free quite often as well.
I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess you weren’t a fan of MacFarlane’s hosting.
Tangential anecdote: of the wangs listed, I have only seen Peter Sarsgard’s (I mostly watch cartoons, okay?), but that time I saw it happened to be a screening of Kinsey at which he was present to do audience Q&A. I took a picture for my friend of her with him after. You’d think that would have been awkward, but he was incredibly nice and nonchalant about it.
Anyway, I still think the boob song was tasteless, even if the meta-humor was that it was *supposed* to be tasteless and somehow called out Hollywood or something-something-calling-it-statire-makes-it-okay.
I didn’t get the big brouhaha about the song? I agree it was tacky, and it gave me those “embarrassed for you” feelings while watching (as watching family guy sometimes does) but, idk, its childishness was by design in order to laugh at how men really like boobs. I don’t get how that’s super offensive.
I really don’t see the problem. If Hollywood actresses are so easily offended then they shouldn’t show off their breasts for money. If Hollywood people in general are so easily offended then they shouldn’t have asked Seth MacFarlane to host the Oscars. HE’S SETH MACFARLANE; WHAT DID THEY EXPECT?
As an aside, I’m a little disappointed that I’ve seen more of the musical wangs than melodious racks.
I was trying to write this same thing, but kept trying to rhyme wang, and it really only works for hang and shebang.
Don’t care about false equivalents, I smirked.
The idea that it’s somehow okay for Seth McFarlane to be a giant jackass because everyone knows he’s a giant jackass is some of the stupidest justification I’ve heard. Ever.
If you know there is something terribly wrong with you as a human being and you just expect the world to deal instead of trying to not be an entire piece of shit, that’s not on society to deal with. It’s just more on you.
Eh, I found it hard to get riled up over McFarlane’s performance. It was an obvious attempt to appeal to the teenage male demographic (i.e. me), so you kinda knew what to expect. You know, a show just controversial enough to make Hollywood people jeer and giggle but not controversial enough to be satirical or interesting.
I guess I’m just so used to jackasses on the Internet that this sort of stuff barely gets a response from me anymore.
Also, just to throw the question out there, do we even need a host for the Oscars? I mean, all the funniest moments were when the actors were cracking wise at each other. Can’t we have an Oscars that feels authentic and isn’t obviously scripted?
The flaw for me with the outrage is that I wouldn’t have been offended if Tina Fey was singing about cock, same as Seth singing about tits didn’t bother me. Neither would’ve been amusing, but not being amusing doesn’t justify self-indignation
Jason Mewes, ’nuff said.
I thought it was a really good joke. But that’s when I thought it was going to cut off at “we saw your boobs”, and instead he did a whole song about it, complete with gay men’s choir. That would have been a fantastic 8 second gag.
I didn’t see the Oscars. However, I am basking in a warm haze of “Told You So” energy now that people are finally seeming to wake up to what a heinous prick McFarlane is, always has been and probably always will be.
@Powerleveler
The idea that it’s somehow okay for Seth McFarlane to be a giant jackass because everyone knows he’s a giant jackass is some of the stupidest justification I’ve heard. Ever.
Which is not the justification being used. The “justification” is that it’s OK for Seth McFarlane to be a giant jackass because everyone knows he’s a giant jackass and they still booked him for the gig.
The suggestion that those invited to the Oscars can only choose between refusing to attend and not admitting to being offended by the host is in itself pretty ridiculous, of course. But expecting people to accept you’re a jackass and being paid by people who know you’re a jackass are two very different things.
“its childishness was by design in order to laugh at how men really like boobs. I don’t get how that’s super offensive.”
For me, it’s a problem of power and double-standards. Men are supposed to like and try and see boobs, while women are supposed to hide them and are sluts if they show them off. I know the song wasn’t intended to be a deep commentary on that dynamic, and was probably trying to make fun of guys instead of/as well as the women, but it still rubs me the wrong way.
Tina Fey singing a song about wangs wouldn’t be the same, as naked wangs don’t have the same history of shaming as naked boobs. Streakers don’t result in huge FCC scandals, do they? We don’t talk much about Mark Roberts.
Now, men trying very loudly not to look at other men’s wangs, that has a history of shaming, but it’s a very different context.
Seth MacfRlane is a puerile manbaby stuck at the age where saying poo poo is hilarious. The only party I’d invite him to is one that celebrates his death by imprisoning him in a giant wicker shit and setting fire to it.
Beacon: If Hollywood people in general are so easily offended then they shouldn’t have asked Seth MacFarlane to host the Oscars.
Who is this ‘they’? Yes, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences hired McFarlane to host their awards show. I doubt they received any input from the assembled actors and actresses at the show, or those being nominated for awards, or those being referenced in his song, or anyone viewing along from home.
As it happens, the folks who hired him are, indeed, standing by his right to be an obnoxious, sexist jerk at their show. And he does indeed have the right to make an ass of himself – there can indeed be humor in such a thing, and he’s made a living off of doing so.
Nonetheless, none of that grants him immunity from criticism. In this case, I didn’t find his jokes funny or appropriate. I thought many were in poor taste, and thought that the particular song in question was, yes, offensive and demeaning and had no place at an event like this.
there is a wahlberg-in-boogie-nights joke in there somewhere, but im way lazy.
Shouldn’t it be “you have to pay him extra to keep his kilt on”?
Chelsea Handler did nearly exactly this on her show last night. I think they used the word “junk” though.
If you don’t want your award show presenter to be an asshole then don’t hire a known asshole to be your awards show presenter. This is Ricky Gervais all over again … except sometimes Seth is funny.
It’s like the story of the Scorpion and the Frog…
A scorpion and a frog meet on the bank of a stream and the scorpion asks the frog to watch American Dad (and also help him cross the stream). The frog asks, “How do I know you won’t sting me?” The scorpion says, “Boobs.”
The frog is satisfied, and they set out, but in midstream, the scorpion stings the frog. The frog feels the onset of paralysis and starts to sink, knowing they both will drown, but has just enough time to gasp “Why?”
Replies the scorpion: “Boobs”
I didn’t watch the Oscars (never do), and since I think McFarlane is a collosal jackass, I wouldn’t have even if I usually did.
The Sound of Music gag to introduce Christopher Plummer, while possibly the easiest and most Family Guy-esque joke you could possibly make, was admittedly perfect, but pretty much everything else was weaksauce to blatantly offensive. I can’t decide which is more aggravating: McFarlane’s genuine not giving a shit, or Gervais’s pretending not to give a shit to mask a disgusting overwhelming need to be accepted by the people he’s skewering.
The thing that really pushes “We Saw Your Boobs” over the edge into uncomfortable territory for me is the fact that several of the instances listed in the song were from scenes about rape, and one wasn’t a movie at all, but an actual real-life violation of privacy.
Yeah, the only one of the movies mentioned that I’ve actually seen is Titanic so I can’t speak to the context of the other movies but I do think Scarlet Johansson has every right to be offended by the song since she – unlike the other actresses – wasn’t showing the world her breasts for a paycheck. I wonder if that’s why she isn’t seen with her Avengers co-stars later in the show.
Beacon, that’s twice you’ve mentioned that they’re “showing their boobs for a paycheck”, and it’s a crap argument. They were paid, yes, but as part of a work of art. Four of those boob scenes he mentioned were during rape scenes, for instance. Your phrasing seems intended to make it sound like they were just paid to show their boobs to people for fun.
So you’re saying decisions made for the sake of artwork have no place in a Hollywood awards ceremony but its ME who has the “crap argument”?
Yeah, I think I’ll stick to me belief that Scarlet Johansson is the only named actress that has any right to be offended.
No, I’m saying that you referring to them as “showing their breasts for money” is disrespectful, dishonest, inaccurate, and misogynistic.
The argument that ‘it’s just showing boobs for money’ also leaves out that actresses, in order to stay employed, are expected to get naked if demanded. Actors do not face this requirement. Even in Spartacus one of the male leads refused to strip down and was allowed to wear a prosthetic wang.
How is it dishonest? Did those actresses not get money for their work?
I’d have said that the male actors MGK named were “showing their wangs for money” (or art or continued employment in entertainment or however you want to justify them making a choice that they may later regret)too but no one seems to be offended on their behalf so there’s no reason to make that argument.
“We’ll never see Leonardo DiCaprio’s thing
(unless Scorcese asks)”
Didn’t we see his thing in “Total Eclipse”?
Please Seth McFarlane don’t do anything else that would make me feel guilty about watching the Neil DeGrasse Tyson “Cosmos”.