73.) If You Do Everything That Is Asked Of You With Competence And Excellence, Sooner Or Later That Standard Becomes Expected
74.) The “Do Not Touch” Rule Exists For A Reason
75.) You Will Massacre According To The Rules
76.) Playing Coy Is Not Always The Best Strategy
77.) Babies Are Dangerous
78.) ORGIES! ORGIES! WE WANT ORGIES!
79.) Spaniards Speak (And Hold Their Vests) In Unison
80.) Not All Ancient Romans Were Good With Latin
81.) Sometimes The Best Victory You Can Manage Is A No-Score Win
82.) Showmanship Is Everything
83.) When Delivering An Expository Monologue, Shout
84.) Doctors Are – Hey Wait That Guy Has A Vase On His Head
85.) “Indomitable” Means “Run Away”
86.) Except When It Doesn’t
87.) Owls Hate Woodpeckers
88.) The Roman Army Had A Drill For Absolutely Every Occasion
89.) When You Are In Love, You Cry A Lot
90.) Calories From Boar Fat Don’t Count
91.) Breaking The Pax Romana Is Serious Shit
92.) All Dogs Speak All Dialects Of Dog
93.) Always Look Behind You Before Saying Something Insulting About Someone Not Present
94.) Vikings Often Ponder Existential Questions
95.) This Ain’t A Scene, It’s An Arms Race
96.) If You Spend Your Life Making People Laugh You Will Not Soon Be Forgotten
97.) Cheese Can Be Really Stinky
98.) Rebellion Stirs In The Soul Quicker Than You Would Think
99.) Roman Numerals Are A Source Of Meta-Comedy
100.) Always, Always, Always Listen To Asterix
101.) Julius Caesar Sometimes Lost His Temper
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12 users responded in this post
Poor, poor Julius.
Hey, 92 is unfair. It took those two quite a bit of work to learn each others’ language.
You forgot an “orgies” there, sweetheart.
“How can I frighten you when I don’t know the meaning of fear?”
That is… a very good question. Shit, I’m going need to sit down for this one….
Holy crap, more of this?
I am extremely disappointed with this service and would like my money back now, please.
On 87 it appears someone got so excited that they drew right on the picture. Calm MGK, calm.
Ah, profanity symbols… When I was a wee lass, I used to interpret the profanity symbols as meaningless angry grunting. Those were more innocent times.
Valuaddetax. Excellent.
Yes. More of this, please.
These are all fun, but…you did have them up on the old site, right? And are now reposting them? These aren’t additional things you learned from Asterix beyond the much older ones? Because that’s been bugging me, trying to figure it out.
Brilliant as Goscinny and Uderzo are, and oh my yes they are, I don’t think enough credit goes to the translators. Asterix is incredibly punny, and that level of wordplay is inextricably tied to the language is exists in. To take all of those gags, and translate them in both word and spirit, is something rare.
John: It’s not exactly a reposting per se, as I have the old taglines I came up with still in my LJ archive file but I didn’t have the corresponding images (and frequently didn’t remember what image went to what line). So this is kind of a cover version of the first time around.
Evan – that’s an important point. I first read Asterix while I was living in Spain, and it was in an English, British translation, often with a “British” flavor (Obelix: “Oh, I say!”): years later, I came accross an American translation, and the “flavor” of the writing seemed rather off to me.