(NOTE: Due to Flapjacks complaining vociferously, from now on I will not be editing his posts for clarity. You have been warned. — MGK)
so last time i posted here i was all “hey guys “max payne” is the best movie of the year.” but MGK was all “that is so anti-intellectual flapjacks, you should try watching the oscar nominees at least,” and he has a point because if it wasn’t for the oscars i never would have found out about arthouse hits like “gladiator” or “lord of the rings.”
so i went to my local theatre and paid honest dollars to go see the best that hollywood and independent hollywood have to offer, and my new pick for best movie of 2008 is “the reader.” cause kate winslet is in it and, basically, the first forty minutes of the movie is kate winslet boning.
she does full backal and you can see her tits. but it is not just about seeing kate winslet’s tits, because although they are great tits you have to admit watching kate winslet get naked and fuck is not exactly a new thing. after all there are top five lists devoted to kate winslet fucking on camera.
but there is forty minutes of it this time around! and although kate winslet boning is not new, kate winslet boning a lot makes this the best single supply of kate winslet doin’ it that exists known to man short of sam mendes’ private video collection. sure, in this movie she is boning some german teenager who looks like that guy from “cabaret” and that is kind of weird, but if you squint you can kinda pretend that he is george michael from “arrested development” and who wouldn’t want to watch that kid fuck kate winslet?
you’d download it off the internet if it existed. you really would.
but you can forget everything after the first forty minutes because after that there isn’t any boning and it’s about how the holocaust was bad and stuff. it is almost like they said “hey, we have this movie which has kate winslet getting fucked silly for the first half. how do we balance that out? oh, i got it, genocide.”
which just goes to show you that porn is almost always better than hollywood. cause no genocide.