45 users responded in this post

Subscribe to this post comment rss or trackback url
mygif

the movie’s seven-minute long sequence where the Punisher skullfucks Julia Stiles with the barrel of an Uzi

I really need to see that.

I can live without the rest, just as I’ve lived without the past Punisher movies.

ReplyReply
mygif

They should just stop these, seriously. Although Micheal Bay Jr.’s robot dog sounds cool.

ReplyReply
mygif

I can only assume that the box office numbers given are not adjusted for future ticket prices as ticket prices will most likely continue to climb as they have been for the past 20 years.

I kinda liked War Zone. The Thomas Jane movie was superior by far, but War Zone was its value as kind of a cross between the 1960’s Batman and Hannibal Lecter.

ReplyReply
mygif

“Dane Cook as the Punisher”

This combination of words made me want to strangle a puppy.

ReplyReply
mygif

With the way things are going, we should have at least seen Punisher X: Punisher in Space by now…

At the very least Punisher vs. Jason.

ReplyReply
mygif
karellan said on June 16th, 2009 at 10:05 am

I hate to admit that I would watch a She-Punisher movie starring Megan Fox. The pirate stuff would have to go, but the initial concept actually sounds watchable.

ReplyReply
mygif
Rob Brown said on June 16th, 2009 at 10:13 am

This combination of words made me want to strangle a puppy.

If the puppy had been in charge of casting, I wouldn’t stand in your way.

…starring Joe Jonas as the Punisher…

I have thus far done without the :puke: smilie when posting comments here, but I need it now. I didn’t immediately realize that we were talking about one of the Jonas Brothers here.

ReplyReply
mygif

That first one?

Wasn’t that Desperado, that movie with Antonio Banderas?

ReplyReply
mygif
Nickshogun said on June 16th, 2009 at 10:47 am

Tracy Morgan would be a much more likeable villain than John Travolta.

ReplyReply
mygif
HitTheTargets said on June 16th, 2009 at 10:58 am

I’m not 100% sure what your point here is, other than perhaps making PAD’s Mangaverse Punisher seem slightly less embarrassing (slightly). Also apparently Joe Quesada is immortal and he has a lifetime appointment?

ReplyReply
mygif
Lister Sage said on June 16th, 2009 at 11:46 am

I could see myself going to War Journal and the 2032 Punisher.

karellan: As long as she keeps her mouth shut I may go see it. She can’t fucking act, but if she wants to strike a pose and hold a gun I can’t see how she could fuck that up.

“Marvel-Fuji”
That’s a Marvel 2099 reference isn’t it?

ReplyReply
mygif

Punisher is a pretty simple concept. How hard is it to make a kick-ass Punisher movie?

ReplyReply
mygif
Will Partridge said on June 16th, 2009 at 12:26 pm

Jodie Foster’s character in “The Brave One” is something like a female Punisher. I remember watching it and being surprised at well the concept worked. She would ride the subways, looking like a frail, helpless, frightened woman. That is, perfect bait for the kind of people she was hunting. No one expects a woman like her to be a cold, ruthless killer. Criminals would approach her, expecting an easy target, and the last thing they’d see is the gun she was holding hidden in her purse.

So yeah, you could definitely make a decent Punisher movie with a woman as the title role.

ReplyReply
mygif

I’ve heard that Warzone was actually pretty kickass (though I still haven’t gotten around to watching it, so that’s just hearsay).

ReplyReply
mygif

Last time they made a decent-ish movie but got the character WAY wrong. This time they got the character right but made a shitty movie.
The very first attempt (Dolph Lundgren anybody?) had both parts go horribly, horribly, wrong.

The Punisher: a Perfect Storm of movie fuck-ups.

…and the future does not look especially bright…

ReplyReply
mygif

So, what brought this on? Because I might go to see Jayne as The Punisher…

ReplyReply
mygif

Adam Baldwin?

I might watch it.

ReplyReply
mygif

I enjoyed War Zone a lot, but that’s because I saw it with the right group of friends in the right theater. Watching it at home alone may not be as fun.

Still, it’s an unapologetically smart-stupid movie that’s (apparently) pretty faithful to the comics, and features a terrific villain in Jigsaw. And it features one of the better subversions of action expectations after setting up a bunch of badguys who know Parkour…

ReplyReply
mygif
Lister Sage said on June 16th, 2009 at 1:16 pm

BringTheNoise: I recommend the Punisher movie with Thomas Jane. I don’t understand why people had a problem with Travolta. He played his part, nothing special, but you knew he was going to die at the end of it anyway so what does it matter.

ReplyReply
mygif

Yeah, I’ve got the Jane movie on DVD. I have to admit that I bought it mostly to see Kevin Nash as an actor, but I enjoyed the whole thing. Never understood the Travolta hate either.

ReplyReply
mygif

[…] View original here:  Mightygodking.com » Post Topic » A guide to the future […]

mygif

I enjoyed War Zone a helluva lot more than the Travoltavesty, but I’d still rather see Dolph Lundgren return for an adaptation of Mother Russia. Really.

ReplyReply
mygif
Andrew W. said on June 16th, 2009 at 2:04 pm

@Panzer: I don’t think I understand where the Dolph Lundgren one went wrong with the character.

ReplyReply
mygif
ladypeyton said on June 16th, 2009 at 3:07 pm

I am in mourning for the 7 years* it took to watch Punisher War Zone. I will never get those years back.

*time measured subjectively

ReplyReply
mygif

War Zone is The Transporter of comic book movies. You either buy the crazy shit you see on screen with a smile or you dont.

ReplyReply
mygif
Lister Sage said on June 16th, 2009 at 3:42 pm

Andrew W: Well, they left the skull off his shirt. Which I realize it’s much, but come on. How the fuck do you miss the one thing that makes the Punisher a “superhero”, his logo? That, and was it really nessicary to see his ass?

ReplyReply
mygif

Lister Sage: That’s cuz the Lundgren movie wasn’t supposed to be a Punisher movie originally and most of it had filmed before they decided to make it one.

ReplyReply
mygif
Mister Terrific said on June 16th, 2009 at 5:10 pm

Megan Fox as Punishette?

You realize of course that Peter David would end up writing every single movie novelization…

ReplyReply
mygif

why would you do this?

ReplyReply
mygif

I still maintain that the 2004 Punisher film was better than War Zone, and Thomas Jane was a great Punisher who was saddled with a crappy quasi-adaptation of Welcome Home, Frank. (And believe me, I LIKED the film, but even I recognize shitty adaptations when I see them.)

ReplyReply
mygif

A step by step guide on how to make a decent Punisher movie.

1. Use a random Garth Ennis Punisher comic as a storyboard.

2. That’s IT. You’re fucking DONE. How hard was that exactly? Yeah, that’s what I thought.

ReplyReply
mygif

I don’t get it. Lady Punisher more than doubles the box office for Punisher 3D, and there is no
Punish-Arrr sequel slated for 2022? Oh Hollywood, you disappoint me now, you will disappoint me forever.

ReplyReply
mygif

I smacked my forehead the first time I heard a Punisher movie was being made, and I will continue to smack my forehead as they continue to be made.

the concept just doesn’t work for films because the revenge trope is too common in cinema. what makes Castle fun to read about it is that he’s in a universe with superheroes who don’t kill. remove that, and it’s kind of bland and overdone.

ReplyReply
mygif

I actually liked the Tom Jane movie, bastardized version of “Welcome Back Frank” or no. I thought Jane was a fine Frank Castle and was hoping that he’d return to reprise the role. Plus, it had that really awesome part with the guitar-playing assassin.

Anyway, I own it, and I watch it occasionally and enjoy it. War Zone, on the other hand, I rented. And I was actually bored out of my mind for most of it. How I could be bored with a movie that features a man punching through another man’s head is beyond me, but there it is.

ReplyReply
mygif

Some properties just don’t translate from comics to film. Not sure why, but “The Punisher” as a live action film has always been laughable.

ReplyReply
mygif
RobotKeaton said on June 17th, 2009 at 1:55 am

The only Punisher comics I ever really like are the ones where he fights a bunch of C-list supervillains. Is it really so hard to get the rights for Basilisk, The Human Fly and Mandrill?

ReplyReply
mygif

goblin has a point — a Punisher movie could work as a spinoff of the Marvelverse movies (with cameos from the established heroes being all “dude, you’re going too far!” so Frank can be all dark and edgy at them), but as a standalone concept, he’s too generic to stand out. Unless you really pushed the boat out and made a seriously good film of it, but that’s never a certain proposition.

ReplyReply
mygif

Totally agree with goblin. The Punisher works because he’s not like other comic book heroes…but put him in an action movie, and he’s the guy from Death Wish with a weird T-shirt. :)

(Oh, and Jason X is head and shoulders and right down to the waist the best “Friday the 13th” movie, bar none. If they could duplicate that level of sheer balls-to-the-wall insanity for a Punisher movie, they might actually have something.)

ReplyReply
mygif

Posting off-topic here, but I am always happy to see Jason X get the respect that it deserves. How could a film that should’ve gone so wrong go so right?

ReplyReply
mygif
Craig Oxbrow said on June 17th, 2009 at 11:35 am

As noted above, there are dozens of Punisher movies, just three with the title.

(Likewise, there are least three better Judge Dredd films than Judge Dredd.)

ReplyReply
mygif
Lister Sage said on June 17th, 2009 at 2:48 pm

Bryan: I have a suspicion that the Lions Gate intended to push Jane out of the project. I remember reading an article on SuperHeroHype saying that he was dropping out of, what became, War Zone because they kept dragging their feet on the script. They announce the film in 2004, they rewrite and rewrite and rewrite till 2007 rolls around, Jane drops out that May, they line up a new actor in July and they were shooting by October. And while the guy they got looks more like Castle he’s not as good an actor. Luckily he didn’t say a lot it the film. Can you imagine how good it would have been to see Jane’s Punisher up against Dominic West’s Jigsaw? That would have been cool.

ReplyReply
mygif
Bryce (Mouser) said on June 17th, 2009 at 8:28 pm

But the question is:

What cameo does Stan (The Man) Lee play?

ReplyReply
mygif
Evil Midnight Lurker said on June 17th, 2009 at 10:17 pm

I would argue that it is simply not possible to create a good movie about the Punisher, for the very basic reason that *it is not possible to tell a good story about the Punisher.*

Your mileage will no doubt vary.

ReplyReply
mygif

“What cameo does Stan (The Man) Lee play?”

The street corner pimp, of course.

ReplyReply
mygif

I would see every single one of those.

ReplyReply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Please Note: Comment moderation may be active so there is no need to resubmit your comments