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mygif

Why the heck is Heimdall going to be black in Thor?

To spite Stormfronters who are really into Thor. Which I mean, I call that a worthy goal.

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mygif

To spite Stormfronters who are really into Thor.

SOLD.

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Candlejack said on May 2nd, 2010 at 1:00 pm

Ooh, is it too late to fire the guy playing Thor now, and replace him with a bleached-afro Michael Jai White?

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Brian T. said on May 5th, 2010 at 5:36 am

I find myself having to agree with pretty much everything Jim Smith said.

There are a ton of DC’s B and C-list characters I like more than the “big guns.” But still…

Wildcat is the poster child for everything I hate about post-1998 DC comics. The guy doesn’t really offer anything other than an ugly mask and a high tolerance for alcohol, but we’re supposed to think he’s awesome because… well… David Goyer and Geoff Johns liked him when they were writing JSA together. And because Chuck Austen tried to Mary Sue him into having better combat skills, I guess. And that one Grant Morrison JLA story, like, 11 years ago.

Even if we give Wildcat a few bonus points for sleeping with Catwoman and teaching Batman how to box… he’s still an old guy with a motorcycle who doesn’t even wear a bulletproof vest or anything to help explain why he hasn’t died yet. The dude has no business going up against people with guns, much less anybody with decent superpowers.

Especially considering how many times he has gotten limbs broken, been paralyzed, been repeatedly shot and suffered all sorts of injuries that should make it hard to open a beer, much less jump around like he’s the Creeper or something.

And yet there he is, constantly defeating people who shoot beams out of their hands and stuff with his amazing superpower of acting like a jerk in a way that some people perceive as “bad ass.”

If it wasn’t for the fact that the writers cheat in his favor, his “cunning plans” wouldn’t ever work because he’d be too busy bleeding out on the ground to try anything fancy.

Meanwhile, all sorts of characters who are both more interesting and more useful in a fight get short shrift just because the guys currently writing and editing the comics don’t like them or consider them expendable.

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mygif

I think Wildcat’s a victim of the “Batman syndrome”, which seems to have been the 2000s version of the “Wolverine syndrome” of the 1990s.

Ever since Morrison wrote Batman as being able to take down multiple Superman-level characters in the opening arc of his JLA run, every superteam has had to have a badass with no real superpowers who routinely schools his non-powered teammates. Compare this to the 1990s when every superteam needed a feral berserker with a hair-trigger.

Writers need to realise that Batman and Captain America are the exceptions, not the rule.

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Brian T. said on May 7th, 2010 at 1:18 am

Exactly.

Wildcat shouldn’t even be able to school the other non-powered heroes on his own team. They have things like laser guns and blackout bombs.

Wildcat knows at least two or three martial arts and he jumps around a lot. That should make him last about three minutes against anybody tougher than Dr. Mid-Nite. Less if the other guy has an assault rifle.

Especially when you consider that the dude is almost a century old and physically somewhere around sixty.

But Wildcat has a flimsy connection to Batman, so we’re supposed to just turn off our brains and go with the idea that he should be fighting crime instead of… I don’t know… retiring and running a boxing gym or something that won’t get him killed.

Meanwhile, I spent years reading posts on message boards about how Captain Atom, Zatanna, Firestorm and Metamorpho weren’t quite powerful enough to be in the JLA.

You know… despite the fact that Metamorpho could probably defeat the whole JSA by himself, Zatanna can do pretty much anything, Firestorm has godlike control over physical matter and Captain Atom can do all sorts of funky stuff with energy in addition to being superstrong and able to fly.

But they never had Batman teach them aikido, so apparently they don’t rate.

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mygif

@BrianT: WTF? Metamorpho worked with Batman, and Batman can’t vouch for him? Mor like Bat-Douche. I know he has one of those in his utility belt.

Although it’s most likely because a Metamorpho action figure wouldn’t sell that well.

“Say kiddo, whaddya want?”

“I want Batman! He punches stuff!”

“What about Metamorpho?”

“Who the fuck?”

“Metamorpho! From the Outsiders!”

“Huh?”

“When Batman decided to start his own Justice Jeague, with hookers and blackjack! Well, no hookers… or blackjack… but he had Black Lightning!”

“That sounds racist, Daddy.”

“Well… uh… Oh! How about Halo?”

“Who?”

“The amnesiac teenager with aura powers he picked up in a warzone!”

“…”

“What?”

“…that just sounds wrong.”

“… Fuck it, get the Batman toy, you little snot.”

“Thanks, Daddy.”

“I told ya, I’m not your Daddy. Now sniff this chloroform rag while I get the ball gag ready.”

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mygif

I just managed to buy Supergirl #52, and I rather liked Brainy being all sad.
Though this is my least favorite part of the retcon so far.
When I read Legion of 3 Worlds, I saw Supergirl in her headband costume and developed a little AU where she follows the founders back to Earth and causes Great Angst for everyone; and a only-vaugely probable solution is cooked up to fake her death.
Problem fixed.

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