I knew Inception was possible because I’d done it to my wife…my blow-up wife.
“That fucker has parked his car illegally on the corner for the LAST GODDAMN TIME. I am now going to go kick his ass LITERALLY four ways from Sunday!”
I am so so so so so sorry for this:
“The cake is a lie!”
“So you see, Archie, NOW, you’ll be able to stare at my butt and grope yourself, WITHOUT having to hunch your back and damage your posture.”
“You get high your way, I’ll get high my way.”
Don’t ask questions: it’s STEAMPUNK!
“Veteran or not, Archie, I need these more than you do.”
“I believe it was YOU who said: ‘Shortest guy has to blow Weatherbee’! Who’s laughing NOW, Andrews?”
“True geniuses are never appreciated in their own lifetime. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have an R-Rated movie to catch…”
“I’m finally tall enough to do Moose standing up!”
Go Go Gadget Dr. Scholl’s!
Strange graffiti superhero combo sighted in Miami:
“Now all I have to do is find a pair of bell bottoms. Then they’ll HAVE to let me on that roller coaster!”
Ok, I’m gonna go get my Splendorman costume – be right back!
“Veronica mentioned yesterday that she has a foot fetish. Say hello to the new MAYOR OF MUFFINTOWN!!!! OH YEAH, THAH BIG ‘D’ BE HITTIN’ THAT TONITE!!!”
No longer am I a disproportionate tripod.
“Hey Archie, I heard you like walking, so I put shoes on your shoes, so you can walk while you walk!”
“Ha! Let’s see Frank Castle try and kill the NEW STILTMAN!”
“As God is my witness, I will PROVE that a white man can jump!”
“The days of Dilton Doily’s ignominy and marginalization are OVER. Now the is the Age…of STILTON.”
Also now the is the time for an edit button, apparently.
At last Archie, you will no longer have to bend over .
Beware the WHEELERS, Arch!
“You’ll see, Archie: This will be the greatest Carnevale Riverdale has ever seen!”
“Gotta run, Arch. Gonna kill some giraffes in the head with my finger gun.”
“Who’s strapping on twelve inches now?”
“I’m just going to clean the leaves out of the gutters for my dad. Why do you ask?”
“See, my parents keep leaving my inhaler on the top shelf. I may look like a jackass, but at least I’m a breathing jackass.”
“Yeah, Skynet’s getting pretty desperate. Anyway, seen Mr. and Mrs. Connor around lately?”
“See, this way the filth can’t touch me!”
“Bow down: I am the emperor of dreams;
I crown me with the million-colored sun
Of secret worlds incredible, and take
Their trailing skies for vestment when I soar,
Throned on the mounting zenith, and illume
The spaceward-flown horizons infinite.”
“Shoes for Industry, comrade!”
“Betty likes to leave her window open.”
“Otherwise, it drags on the ground.”
“Am I on stilts, or do I have a second pair of shoes attached to a horizontal bar that’s 6 feet long? Thanks to perspective, even I’m not sure anymore.”
“OK, I’ll admit that it’s harder than I’d thought. But I’ll catch that road runner this time!”
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