19
Jan
Supposedly Not Improved Archie
Posted by MGK Published in Archie (Improved Or Otherwise), Comics, Interactive Fun Time PartySearch
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“By Order of Jughead Jones, Overlord of Riverdale, all red-headed males will be shot on sight!”
“Start Running, Archie.”
“WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH”
“SHIT IS SHINOLA”
“Wanted: Betty Cooper
Shoot on sight”
“Winner gets to screw me
-Veronica Lodge”
Riverdale Naturist Park
Now Open
Seniors Only.
“Honk LOUD if you like my strange scribbling!”
“Honk with your BODY.”
Archie Comics
A Division of General Dynamics
“Thinking is man’s only basic virtue, from which all the others proceed. And his basic vice, the source of all his evils, is that nameless act which all of you practice, but struggle never to admit: the act of blanking out, the willful suspension of one’s consciousness, the refusal to think-not blindness, but the refusal to see; not ignorance, but the refusal to know. It is the act of unfocusing your mind and inducing an inner fog to escape the responsibility of judgment-on the unstated premise that a thing will not exist if only you refuse to identify it, that A will not be A so long as you do not pronounce the verdict ‘It is.’ Non-thinking is an act of annihilation, a wish to negate existence, an attempt to wipe out reality. But existence exists; reality is not to be wiped out, it will merely wipe out the wiper. By refusing to say ‘It is,’ you are refusing to say ‘I am.’ By suspending your judgment, you are negating your person. When a man declares: ‘Who am I to know?’-he is declaring: ‘Who am I to live?’”
“This one time, at Rand Camp…”
Archie: Are you *sure* that’s Banksy?
Jughead: Absolutely, Arch ol’ pal. Let me get my taser….
“10th Annual Riverdale Naturalist Festival”
“In the interest of fire safety, all gingers required to remain clothed at all times, to avoid spontaneous combustion”
“G.G. gave me 3rd hole access!”
“-The Bee”
“What does ‘OLIGARHY’ mean?”
First sign: “Fart”
Second sign: “Poop”
Optical Illusions
starting @ $5.00 each
Special on
bad perspective
Look upon the yellow sky
of THE LORD THY GOD
Bee 6:27
DEATH ZONE
Lemonade sky
Riverdale Civil Defence
“Yellow mother custard, dripping from a dead dog’s eye.
Crabalocker fishwife, pornographic priestness,
Boy, you’ve been a naughty girl you let your knickers down.”
“I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g’joob.”
“Riverdale Sex Camp UPDATED BLOWJOB HIERARCHY: Those lower on the list MUST provide blowjobs to anybody higher on the list IMMEDIATELY UPON DEMAND.”
“1. Jughead
2. Weatherbee
3. Moose
4. Reggie
5. Dilton
6. Pop
7. Mr. Lodge
8. Mr. Andrews
9. Archie”
“Why does Jughead always wear that crown-lookin’ hat?”
“Because he is the king of Queen Archie’s world”
“I do not like Green Eggs and Ham, I Do Not Like Them Sam I Am.”
“Discuss why the above phrase is an expression of the class struggle in France during the 1860s.”
1st Sign:
ARCHIE ANDREWS!
PLEASE REMEMBER TO CLOSE AND LOCK YOUR WINDOWS BEFORE GOING TO BED!
2nd Sign:
SINCERELY,
EVERYONE IN CAMP WHO HAD TO HEAR THE TWO OF YOU “EXPLORING NEW FRONTIERS” LAST NIGHT
(ALSO, WE’RE PRETTY SURE THERE’S BEARS AND SHIT AROUND HERE)