Hey, remember the “Internet Nice Guy” post from 2007? Well, it still gets traffic and the occasional comment, and I felt I should share this one, from “doesntmatter” (although I added some paragraph breaks to his wall of text):
So funny how everbody jumps on the bandwagon an the females aplaud the author for being totally one sided and saying exactly what they want to hear, while he totally disregards the other side of the story, that some females indeed are bitches who just use males when they are in the need, e.g. if their asshole boyfriend dumped her again (because he just wanted sex and nothing more, and that was clear from the beginning for everyone except for her), perfectly knowing that the guy they are using is loner who wants a girlfriend (and sex, of course) and will do pretty much anything for her, and instead of saying “You? Never!” or just talking to another person they just throw him away after use and forget it.
I mean, how can they NOT know that he of COURSE wants to fuck with her? That does not per se mean that he ONLY wants to fuck with her, but maybe talking and being nice to each other is not the only thing he is dreaming of… Then there are females that just tease males to ridicule them later. That makes one bitter indeed, doesn’t it? And then, if that bitter person complains, it is all HIS fault for being an asshole in the first place? Give me a brake, that is some flawed logic there, he only became a bitter asshole because of what happened, because females used and abused him.
You say that being nice to get sex is creepy, but then you offer the author of this post relationships (and of course sex, a relationship without sex is not a “relationship” of the kind you were talking about when you said things like “marry me” or “i want to bone you for the next 15 years”) because he was nice and said what you want to hear, so what exactly is the difference? That he not indirectly stated that he want’s sex as a reward? Or in other words, that is Nice Guy facade is just more elaborate and well hidden so that you don’t see through it? Maybe he is of the same loser-type as the guy who wrote the rant but has just taken a different aproach by doing the opposite of what the Nice Guy Loner Jerk does, while his ultimate goals remain the same: Getting into a relationship and have sex.
You all feel relieved that you can point to the guys and say “You are the assholes” while you yourself make mistakes, totally disregard his desires and are assholes yourselves, if you follow the kind of logic that is prevailing in this discussion. For example, if you are “stalked” by a guy who wants a relationship with you, you not always give him clear signals that you will never engage in such things with him, and hope that he will realise it sooner or later, while he does not, because he is terribly in love with you (and even if he only wants sex, good lord, you all sound like you have never felt the need for sex when sex wasn’t available. Oh, but i forgot, if a girl wants to fuck she just has to ask pretty much anybody if she is relatively good looking, and even if she is not good looking she can still ask around and on the fifth try or so she will get what she wants while a guy who asks for sex is just a perverted desire-driven asshole. Oh wait, did that sound bitter? Damn, I must be one mean kind of Former Nice Guy, I should better try to learn to communicate, and really be nice, not so cynic, that will help me, ok ok, maybe i should state clearly what i want instead of being passive-aggressive (oh shit, that would be sex first, relationship later, then that is not an option, dammit, my fault for having not the same priorities that are required to get sex, wich would be: Don’t desire Sex at any time, isn’t that really fucked up?)).
TL;DR: There are always two sides to a story, and it DOES matter if you are in a relationship and can talk down to people who are not, or if you are part of the folks which are not in a relationship and try like crazy to get into one only to see all their efforts crumble to dust. A rich man can lightly say that money does not really matter in life, while the poor man will certainly say the opposite. So don’t be so fucking full of yourselves because you were lucky and others were not.
Have fun with it, everybody!