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“I had a good relationship with my parents. They very rarely hit… I think they hit me once, actually, in my whole childhood. They, they, uh, started beating me on the 23rd of December in 1942, and stopped beating me in the late Spring of ’44.” – Feilding Mellish.

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Gentleman Mummy said on June 26th, 2012 at 10:00 am

“There’s still a chance to become conjoined!”

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Mitchell Hundred said on June 26th, 2012 at 10:34 am

I’ve figured it out: you are two halves of the same person! Now we need to fuse you both together before your atoms destabilize!

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Odd King said on June 26th, 2012 at 10:52 am

Eighteen camels, my friend! Eighteen camels and they are yours! Other livestock would also be acceptable! Do you have sheep? Cattle? Horses?! Please, my children are starving! Sixteen camels! The blonde one can do simple chores around the house!

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Now all I need is a cup!

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“Dalton’s finished his rape machine… RUN~!”

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“Wulpf! VAGINAS! VAGINAS, EVER’BODY!”

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Get the needle and thread — the Human Centipede cosplay is a go!

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I’m not letting Luann De Groot lose her cherry before I do!

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Odd King said on June 26th, 2012 at 1:13 pm

Quick! The Bokans have entered the sewers and the monkeys need our help!

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William Kendall said on June 26th, 2012 at 2:39 pm

“Abe Lincoln’s got an axe, and he’s killing everyone! Something about vampires everywhere! Run! Forget about Jughead! Too late for him!”

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The Unstoppable Gravy Express said on June 26th, 2012 at 2:56 pm

“MY GOD! The solution to all my problems… it’s been staring me right in the cock ALL ALONG!! THREEEEEEE-WAAAAYYY……ANNNNDrews!!”

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Gentleman Mummy said on June 26th, 2012 at 5:48 pm

“Ridley! I’ve got two female characters and they’ve BOTH got severe, character-crippling Daddy issues! THIS FILM IS PRACTICALLY WRITTEN!”

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“I JUST TRIED ANGEL DUST! I FUCKING LOVE IT! I’M GONNA KEEP RUNNING TIL I’M HOLDING TWO BLOODY ARMS!! YAAAAAA-HOOOOOOO!!!!!”

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GoatToucher said on June 26th, 2012 at 9:17 pm

Come on girls! The musk-fox extract is kicking in!

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If we all run fast enough, we can smash right through that 4th wall!

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DistantFred said on June 27th, 2012 at 10:27 am

“It’s taken 5 long years, but MEET THE PYRO IS COMING!”

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Odd King said on June 27th, 2012 at 3:07 pm

The McRib is back! Hurry! Before the portal closes!

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I shall see ALL of the anuses!

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“Gangway, girls! Pop Tate’s putting extra bacon on his burgers today only!”

Veronica looks annoyed because “bacon this, bacon that,” is completely played out.

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“Get to da choppa!”

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My idea is similar to Eric’s:

“The Chocklit Shoppe is giving free ice cream to everyone in town! IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER!!”

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