Hello! This is Karen back for another round of guest blogging So You Think You Can Dance Canada!
Alright, so it’s Top 8 Week and instead of doing two pairs dances, the dancers are doing one pairs dance, one solo, and one group number. WTF, CTV?
Your guest judges are Sexy Rexy, Canada’s ballet heartthrob, and Sergio Trujillo, who is a Broadway choreographer from Toronto. Jean-Marc is growing out his hair and it’s still in an awkward phase.
Leah Miller Dress Report: it looks like one of those toilet paper dresses that women make at bachelorette parties or to enter Charmin crowd-sourcing contests. B-
Awkward Commercial Promotion Report: Thanks to Degree clinical-grade deodorant for profuse sweaters, a viewer will win an exotic vacation!
Mackenzie and Janick (hip hop): Great Luther Brown number; ten times more interesting than half the hip hop numbers on the American show, blah blah blah. Mackenzie and Janick definitely hit this, but I don’t think they sold the swagger that Luther wanted them to sell. Jean-Marc suggests that Luther should run in the Toronto mayoral race, which is an awkward thing to say but not the worst idea he’s ever had. The costumes reminded me of World of Goo, or maybe a sexy oil spill.
“You move so well, gosh!” says Leah Miller, who has presumably graduated from middle school.
Jeff’s Solo: the dancers are asked about their favourite thing about their hometown. Jeff says he loves the spontaneity of Alberta thunderstorms and dances to Radiohead with those lovely legs, so I’m sold.
Natalie’s Solo: Am I going to comment on all these solos? Oh, okay. Watching people dance to Alicia Keys is uncomfortable. It’s Natalie’s birthday, yaaaaaaaay.
Danielle and Denys (contemporary): Sabrina Matthews of the icky suicide-attempt dance from several weeks ago does “A Tribute to Our Fallen Soldiers.” It’s pretty okay. Sergio calls Denys, “a true little Baryshnikov,” which is a decent comparison. Denys is hands down the best dancer in this competition and I love him for it, but I don’t usually love-love him if you know what I’m saying. Nevertheless, he’s looking reeeeeeeeeal good in this hot Communist soldier, Joseph Fiennes in Enemy at the Gates-kinda way and it’s doing it for me.
If Denys is Baryshnikov/Joseph Fiennes, then Danielle is the Winona Ryder of dance. Like Winona Ryder, I can’t really picture spooky-sweet Danielle as a grieving soldier’s wife. If there were a God, he’d give me Reality Bites: The Musical. Or maybe Bram Stoker’s Dracula: The Musical. Denys could play Gary Oldman. That would be believable.
Amanda’s Solo: Amanda is from Mississauga. What is there to love about Mississauga? Amanda says the Port Credit Harbour. Good save, Legs McGee! Her solo is eclectic and fierce.
Sebastian’s Solo: Sebastian is a Toronto boy who loves diversity and dances to Stars’ “Your Ex-Lover is Dead” so I have to like him, but this solo is kind of a mess. Good musicality.
Group Number: a sexy pilot and flight attendant jazz number by Sean Cheeseman. I’m not into it. The guys are all over the place, but Denys is flawless. He is the Captain OF MY PANTS.
Amanda and Jeff (contemporary): Mandy Moore choreographs a piece about early-onset Alzheimers. Two contemporary tearjerkers in one night, eh? Looks like a Sabrina Matthews-Mandy Moore throwdown!
Amanda and Jeff both have the most incredible legs and this dance does everything to showcase them, so it’s beautiful. Jean-Marc cries for the second time this evening, but it seems more genuine than his tears for The Troops. Point goes to Mandy Moore.
Leah Miller says something like, “Gee golly, that dance there shore was purty, you guys!” and continues to be grating.
Denys’ Solo: My ladyboner diminishes as Denys dances his effeminate solo. He has suddenly transformed from Joseph Fiennes into Chris Kattan as Mango. And, of course, I love Mango, but for very different reasons.
Janick’s Solo: Jannick is from New Brunswick and likes nature and dancing good solos.
Sebastian and Natalie (cha cha cha): superfail for Sebastian, who is dancing through a hip injury and is wayyyy outside of his comfort zone. But man, does he ever try. Natalie is great, as usual, but has a very unmemorable personality, as usual.
Danielle’s Solo: Lovely solo.
Mackenzie’s Solo: Couldn’t care less about this guy.
Verdict? Sebastian is toast.
Related Articles
No user responded in this post