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Gentleman Mummy said on May 30th, 2012 at 9:16 am

Hand-Jaundice? HAND-JAUNDICE? As if my horrible constipation weren’t enough! Oh, I hope Ronnie gets here with that ‘strenuous treatment’ soon!

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Gentleman Mummy said on May 30th, 2012 at 9:17 am

All I said was “Where the Ho’s at?”. I don’t see why she’d be gone this long.

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Mitchell Hundred said on May 30th, 2012 at 9:38 am

Just remember: no matter what Veronica does, I will always love you (sniffles).

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Oh GOD No. This isn’t marijuana! This is TRIFFID!

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“The girl sure looks like plant food to me!”

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“Like a barrel with five bulging ridges in place of staves. Lateral breakages, as of thinnish stalks, are at equator in middle of these ridges. In furrows between ridges are curious growths. Combs or wings that fold up and spread out like fans. All greatly damaged but one, which gives almost seven-foot wing spread. Arrangement reminds one of certain monsters of primal myth, especially fabled Elder Things in Necronomicon.”

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Betty! Betty! Can you hear me? It’s going to be all right! We’ll get you out of that trans-dimensional vortex — but whatever you do, don’t let go of Mr. Weatherbee’s hairpiece!

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“Paddycake, paddycake, bakers ma–Okay, look, this doesn’t have to be that hard!”

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William Kendall said on May 30th, 2012 at 1:15 pm

“Jugs, I think our plan to pass off Mr. Lodge’s prized plants as weed isn’t going to turn out well. Reggie’s going to break your kneecaps for this one. Yes, yours. Not mine. You’re the patsy, Jugs.”

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The Great Race of Yith! Quick, feed it Ronnie!

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Greg Morrow said on May 30th, 2012 at 1:52 pm

Alien plant! Why did you eat my penis? It was only this long!

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Odd King said on May 30th, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Run! I’ll try to slow her down!

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Odd King said on May 30th, 2012 at 2:31 pm

Fire mission: grid 734536, direction 4800. Single individual, armed and mobile, moving SSW at 2 m/s.

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The Unstoppable Gravy Express said on May 30th, 2012 at 3:37 pm

“RONNIE, STAY BACK! We were just about to start a three-way with Moose when he got turned into a PLANT!! A FUCKING PLANT!! And now we’re frozen in place! …For God’s sake, RUN!!”

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Odd King said on May 30th, 2012 at 3:52 pm

Yeah, he was standing just like that — you wouldn’t believe how wide he stretched it. But once you’ve seen it, you start seeing it everywhere.

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DistantFred said on May 30th, 2012 at 6:55 pm

“Dilton, what do we do with the hoe to fix this once Ronnie gets back? Dilton? DILLLTOOOOOONNNNN!?”

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Purple overalls, I tell you!”

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Anticorium said on May 31st, 2012 at 1:33 am

“Does it have to be human? Does it have to be mine?”

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Remember: when Veronica gets here, I’ll ask her about the botany homework and the historical significance of Sergius Nawaschin and Léon Guignard. Then, when she says “double fertilization,” we take our dicks out.

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Quick, Jughead, worship it before it destroys us all!

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IT WENT RIGHT FOR MY EYES

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‘Uncle, we’ve collected the Drogna using the hoe to reach across to the cuckoo clock. Now, do we have to face the Vortex? We don’t have any rolls, I don’t want to be evaporated!’

[one for the older UK there]

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It’s sprouting right on Dilton’s grave, Jug! Someone’s gonna figure this out!

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Packerchu said on June 23rd, 2012 at 10:50 pm

“Curse you, Monsanto! CURRRRRSE YOU!”

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