Sep

STAB AT RELEVANCE

Posted by MGK Published in Bad Comedy, Here's A Lot Of Photoshops, Photoshopp'd, Politics

UPDATE: The inevitable sequel.

given today’s news (October 26th, 2020)
it’s my own fault for installing WordPress (March 2nd, 2018)
Dino de Laurentiis: Prophet…or Madman? (December 2nd, 2016)
Why Marvel and I Don’t Hang Out Much Anymore: An Interview With Myself (October 24th, 2016)
Send In the Next Applicant (July 29th, 2016)

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malakim2099 said on September 2nd, 2008 at 9:19 am

Any dark habits of Magic that you’d like to confess to the rest of us? 🙂

(Very awesome cards, btw… I lol’d)

I don’t think she’d like me back. « supervillain said on September 2nd, 2008 at 9:26 am

[…] Mightygodking, which has been pretty great […]

greywulf said on September 2nd, 2008 at 10:03 am

Fricking awesome, that’s what you are.

LOL!

Randy B. said on September 2nd, 2008 at 10:12 am

Quite possibly the best thing you’ve ever photoshopped. Then again I’m an ex-Magic geek, so I probably found this far more entertaining than I should have. :-p

Sig said on September 2nd, 2008 at 10:21 am

I’m both a bit awed by how much thought and effort you’ve put into this and…maybe a little…worried….

FekketCantenel said on September 2nd, 2008 at 10:36 am

RON PAUL REJECTS YOUR ENTIRE MANA-BASED MONETARY SYSTEM WHICH IS BUILT ON A FOUNDATION OF LIES! @#$% YES AWESOME *goes into seizure*

I only half-understand M:TG rules and I still got (and loved) most of these. Nice of you to be bipartisan (equal offense for all!).

Polychrome said on September 2nd, 2008 at 10:39 am

Nice work. Yes/We Can and Renewable Energy look like they could be useful in a real deck.

guayec said on September 2nd, 2008 at 10:47 am

Fucking amazing.

Dave Silva said on September 2nd, 2008 at 11:01 am

… Where the heck did the quote for the “Si Se Puede!” card come from?

Matt said on September 2nd, 2008 at 11:13 am

As an ex-Magic geek, i loved this.

The Daily Show/Colbert Report ones were my favorites.

Andrew said on September 2nd, 2008 at 11:23 am

As awesome as that was — and it WAS awesome — what I want to know most is when Colbert did that threatdown and if it’s online anywhere. That looks funny.

mdh said on September 2nd, 2008 at 11:25 am

“We tried to give him another ability, but.. eh”

priceless.

Sig said on September 2nd, 2008 at 11:37 am

Andrew: I’m guessing that’s a result of the ThreatDown generator. If it’d been on the actual show, I would’ve heard the screams from Toronto.

Andrew said on September 2nd, 2008 at 11:46 am

Awwww, not real 🙁

On the other hand, AWESOME NEW WEBSITE TO PLAY WITH.

Lister Sage said on September 2nd, 2008 at 12:08 pm

Sig: I swear I remember seeing that in an episode, but I couldn’t point to a source.

Cody B said on September 2nd, 2008 at 12:55 pm

MGK, you are my hero…

El Chupacabra said on September 2nd, 2008 at 1:24 pm

Man, this would have been really hilarious if it had been done by someone with a sense of humor. Hopefully someone who’s actually funny will steal this idea.

Randy B. said on September 2nd, 2008 at 1:44 pm

El Chupacabra…trolls actually exist! Where’s Harry Dresden when you need him?

Randy B. said on September 2nd, 2008 at 1:48 pm

Or…I guess someone could play the Keith Olbermann card and tap him to destroy target douchebag.

Kyle W. said on September 2nd, 2008 at 2:16 pm

Funny as ever. I can tell I’ve been away from Magic for a long time when I don’t recognize the fractional mana symbols, but I think I figured out from context that they represent a choice.

Skemono said on September 2nd, 2008 at 2:27 pm

So… Ron Paul is a Kobold?

(By the way, what does the acronym PUMA stand for?)

Jeffrey said on September 2nd, 2008 at 2:53 pm

Oh my god.

Tell me you Photoshopped the “Obama-Biden/Osama bin Laden” bit. Not even Fox News could possibly be that fucking stupid.

supergp said on September 2nd, 2008 at 3:10 pm

Party Unity My Ass.

Lister Sage said on September 2nd, 2008 at 4:03 pm

Jeffrey: You are underestimating the stupidity of Fox News.

Rob Brown said on September 2nd, 2008 at 4:11 pm

Best one was the Ron Paul card.

And how the hell do you know about my Maddow fantasies??! Get out of my head, Bird!

Olbermann’s sometimes a douchebag and sometimes not, in my admittedly biased opinion. I’d like to be able to say he is not now and never will be the Bill O’Reilly of the left, but can’t. Which is a shame, because I do not want us to have anybody like a Bill O’Reilly. I can say that I don’t think he’s as deranged or egotistical as Billo, FWIW.

Tell me you Photoshopped the “Obama-Biden/Osama bin Laden” bit. Not even Fox News could possibly be that fucking stupid.

God, I hope it’s Photoshopped…

Nona Mousse said on September 2nd, 2008 at 4:40 pm

If you suck this dick any harder, it’s going to fall off.

Sage said on September 2nd, 2008 at 7:05 pm

and that’s why this is my favorite blog.

my favorite part was the kucinich elf, and drilling for oil.

MarvinAndroid said on September 2nd, 2008 at 7:45 pm

I just want to point out how broken the Maddow and Michelle Obama cards are, because of how they’re worded. You can actually have them bounce themselves. This makes Maddow a reusable counterspell for one blue and a colorless, which is technically cheaper than the original counterspell (two blue), a card which was reprinted as cancel, which is identical except for costing more, because it was broken at the original cost. This makes Maddow one of the most powerful cards that could exist in the game. Michelle Obama does something similar and nearly as powerful, allowing you to repeatedly steal opponents creatures for two mana.

Why am I analyzing joke cards for viability?
Because I am huge nerd. Then again, so is everyone here.

Flypaper said on September 2nd, 2008 at 8:51 pm

So, McCain is a marginal finisher for a mono-red (i.e. warmongering and belicose) deck, but Obama is utterly unplayable outside of Limited? 😛

Marvin, re-usable or not, counters that only target a specific mechanic are only going to see sideboard play, and 1U is the correct casting cost for those even at Common rarity – I’d say Maddow is fine. Agree that Michelle Obama is utterly broken, and you should add Mike Huckabee to the list (5/4 for 3 with a drawback you can ignore at will? Sold!), though he’s not quite as crazy. I’d be worried about Superior Speechcraft too, depending on how much Blue mana is floating around the metagame.

Also, shouldn’t Democrats be (philosophically) White rather than Blue? I get that they’re the parties’ official colours, but you’re blurring the Flavour Pie! That stuff’s *sacred*!

(…wait, is that Fox News photo real? Yikes!)

MGK said on September 2nd, 2008 at 8:55 pm

Michelle was a mistake on my part and was supposed to specify “another creature.” She’s still broken, of course, thanks to good white recursion cards like Momentary Blink and Flickerwisp, but I was aiming for flavour rather than balance.

Tsochar said on September 2nd, 2008 at 9:11 pm

Rudy Guiliani is by far my favorite card here. Bush is a pretty close second, though, and he’d be nice to have in a madness deck (especially as so many Republican cards have that ability).

NCallahan said on September 2nd, 2008 at 9:37 pm

Ron Paul is possibly the most passionate I have ever seen a magic card. He won’t play your game, Mister!

I am a little lost, though. Could I use Lou Dobbs to buff Stephen Colbert?

Draco said on September 2nd, 2008 at 9:38 pm

The Democrats would end up taking a lot of mana burn. They have the life gain to ameliorate the cost some, but that’s going to be pretty rough with all the damage the republicans can dish out. Barack Obama is the most notable example of this, although i like the lifegain aspect. Flavor-wise I really like the idea of countering spells to produce mana, but unfortunately since the mana is produced after the counter spell is played, you end up with a lot of useless mana.

…Although given the Democrats’ ability to shoot themselves in the foot no matter what incompetence the Republicans show, maybe the ability’s appropriate after all…

Michael John McGee said on September 2nd, 2008 at 9:43 pm

Jeffrey, Flypaper: The Fox News bit is Photoshopped. There were, however, bumper stickers being printed with the same basic gag.

MGK: Awesome beans. It’s a wee bit derivative of the SA Forums thread (here: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2351489 ) but yours is funnier and less in-jokey.

Can we submit our own?

Kate the Short said on September 2nd, 2008 at 10:29 pm

OMG, you made a Rachel Maddow card!

Alasdair said on September 2nd, 2008 at 11:15 pm

Been away from Magic for a while, but remember enough to get that this was awesome. I love that most of the cards are actually playable and relatively balanced – this isn’t just a joke, it could be an actual set!

Favourite card? George W. Bush. I liked it all the more after someone pointed out it fits perfectly into a ‘Madness’ deck. 🙂

Flypaper said on September 2nd, 2008 at 11:46 pm

@ Michael John McGee
Right, I thought so.

Also, for the benefit of geeks at large, the original grandmaster of fake Magic cards is the one and only Mr Yawgatog – http://www.yawgatog.com/ – though of course most of his jokes are about Magic itself.

Greg said on September 2nd, 2008 at 11:57 pm

Excellent. As a current Magic player, I know exactly where you’re going with the cards, although I could offer some nitpicking rules language corrections. For example, Undecided Voters’ second ability has rules text printed in italics and parentheses, like reminder text.

What program did you use to generate these cards?

Jason said on September 3rd, 2008 at 12:18 am

Nice stuff. Is it wrong of me to want a similar deck fashioned after Yu-Gi-Oh!? I never played, but the anime was a guilty pleasure.

Michael John McGee said on September 3rd, 2008 at 12:23 am

I made one.

http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y24/AgentMcGee/magic%20cards/FISA.jpg

Joysweeper said on September 3rd, 2008 at 10:54 pm

… It took me way too long to realize that these were based on Magic cards. Very funny nonetheless.

Thorfin Jungerson said on September 4th, 2008 at 10:39 am

I like how the Palin and Hillary cards have two faces. Truth in advertising at last!

Greg said on September 4th, 2008 at 11:14 pm

Thorfin,

They’re actually flip cards, using a mechanic in the Champions of Kamigawa block.

Annorax said on September 4th, 2008 at 11:48 pm

I’ve got one more for you as well.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v86/annorax/Terrorist.jpg

I can also offer photoshop and rules text assistance if you need it, feel free to email me.

god of cyanide said on September 5th, 2008 at 1:08 am

love these cards! great stuff!

@ ‘rax: mogg fanatic? way to kill the flavor. 🙁 you should have made this card to go with it:

Suicide Bomber – 3B
Creature – Republican Bullshit
Flash
Sacrifice Suicide Bomber: Deal 2 damage to target player. You gain 2 life.
When you play Terrorist Threat, sacrifice Suicide Bomber. If you do, destroy target Democrat.
1/4

ok my geek quota is fulfilled for the day. MGK – thanks for the laughs! 😀

random Dem said on September 5th, 2008 at 12:30 pm

ActBlue’s over $60 million! Let’s update that graphic!

jessecoombs said on September 7th, 2008 at 1:57 pm

This is so much fun, thanks.

Steam Jacket said on September 7th, 2008 at 4:41 pm

[…] than you think. Mash-up blog Mighty God Kings just published this little gem, and is there ever more where that came from. This really makes me want to get back into Magic, if only I could play with a […]

Magic the Gathering: Election Edition « Always Eating Breakfast said on September 7th, 2008 at 11:45 pm

[…] Freaking Hilarious […]

Election 2008 via MTG « Casual Magic said on September 11th, 2008 at 10:01 am

[…] best commentary on the election I’ve seen so far. Here are a sample few cards from the site Mightygodking.com. I couldn’t believe how witty and accurate each card is with each ability. I salute you […]

MTG Wanderer said on September 11th, 2008 at 10:50 am

[…] you love Jon Steward or Stephen Colbert you will love this fake Magic set. I’ve dubbed it Shards of Democracy. […]

When worlds collide | Roaring Elbow said on September 12th, 2008 at 2:04 pm

[…] http://mightygodking.com/index.php/2008/09/02/stab-at-relevance/ […]

H.W.M.B.O. said on September 13th, 2008 at 8:06 pm

@ Dave Silva:
It’s from an RPG called “Shadowrun”. If you haven’t heard of it, I’d suggest Wikipedia and/or borrowing the rule book from someone.

Ironically, the reason I scrolled the comments page was to get to the comment box to give MGK props for the Atzalan reference….

H.W.M.B.O. said on September 13th, 2008 at 8:08 pm

(It occurs to me I should clarify my above comment.)

@ Dave Silva: As you are clearly a web-literate individual (by virtue of the fact you posted) and a person of intellect (because you read MGK ;)) I’m quite confident you’d have thought of both those options to look up Shadowrun. I meant only to recommend the looking up of Shadowrun. Because its cool. And flavourful. And you can roll mitts full of d6.

bryden said on September 15th, 2008 at 4:23 am

I laughed although I take it you don’t like Ron Paul. My favorites were Ron Paul, John McCain’s house, Bill Clinton, and Keith Olbermann. Nice work.

Prof.Jimbles said on September 15th, 2008 at 6:22 am

That was amazing! Excellent work, my good man!

Political Magic Cards | Gaming My Way said on September 15th, 2008 at 2:00 pm

[…] This is a little outside my area, but I found it humourous and I imagine a number of others interested in this site will also see the humor. So, without further ado, check out these politically oriented magic cards. […]

Hoofer said on September 15th, 2008 at 2:06 pm

Nice. Little too much bias towards democrats…..

Ron Paul rejects your entire mana-based monetary system! | MetaFilter said on September 15th, 2008 at 7:45 pm

[…] Paul rejects your entire mana-based monetary system! September 15, 2008 3:03 PM Subscribe Magic: The Election . Part 2. Presented in the grand tradition of Katrina: The Gathering. posted by casarkos (27 […]

funny ‘magic’ cards for 2008 election « cultural capitalism said on September 15th, 2008 at 10:47 pm

[…] http://mightygodking.com/index.php/2008/09/02/stab-at-relevance/ […]

al gore said on September 16th, 2008 at 3:44 am

lol, i must say this is the funniest thing i have ever read

magic: the election 2008 - Craplog.de said on September 16th, 2008 at 11:13 am

[…] die themen geeks und politik müssen sich nicht gegenseitig ausschliessen, wie diese besondere “magic: the gathering”-sammlung zeigt: via mightygodking. […]

Ohgodaconservative said on September 16th, 2008 at 10:01 pm

Its a funny concept, but the overt liberal bias in almost every card kinda turned me off to it. Try to remember conservatives use the internet too, hmm? Its still funny, I’m not afraid to laugh at my own party by any means.. but come on, dish it out both ways, its not hard.

Bob said on September 17th, 2008 at 12:17 am

Would be funny if it wasn’t so damned biased. You made fun of Republicans and Libritarians (Ron Paul), are you afraid to laugh at your own party?

Canti said on September 17th, 2008 at 1:40 am

uhh, you can just use this to make false magic cards…not that hard

http://magic.falseblue.com/

lou said on September 17th, 2008 at 2:31 am

life has a liberal bias. we don’t need to pretend both sides deserve equal ridicule. that’s just that weird republican victimization complex. even though you run everything you still feel sooooo picked on

NetKaos said on September 17th, 2008 at 7:16 am

Un-b-Fucking-elievable. My vote for most genius thing of the political cycle. Seriously.

Ryan G said on September 17th, 2008 at 8:05 am

I’ll print these off. Cheers.

Will Brinkman said on September 17th, 2008 at 3:32 pm

Wow- holy crap. These are amazing. Also, I see I didn’t get in before someone decided to use a humor card post to try and discuss politics and change someone’s social beliefs. How unfortunate.

Indecision 2008 - Magic: The Gathering Edition « Ireneo’s Memory said on September 17th, 2008 at 6:15 pm

[…] Indecision 2008 – Magic: The Gathering Edition September 17, 2008 at 10:15 pm | In Humor, Mashup/Remix, Politics, Propaganda | Tags: 2008 election, barack obama, ccg, democrats, election, Humor, john mccain, magic, magic: the gathering, mashup, Politics, Propaganda, republicans Nerd out to these brilliant parody M:TG cards. […]

Nicole said on September 17th, 2008 at 7:01 pm

Si Se Puede comes from the Disney Channel movie “Gotta Kick it Up” if that helps. Great job on it too. I love the cards. And a lot of these could actually go good in a spoof deck. Got anymore cards in the works?

Tom said on September 17th, 2008 at 9:52 pm

Errr… pretty good, but I was able to tell you are democratic and to you I say pah… (and I am not fat… one card said Republican Supporters were fat…)

Otherwise, rather nice. I am not a fan of magic and I still found some truth in there… like George Bush.

Eric said on September 19th, 2008 at 1:10 am

Funny…
Dumbocraps will be the downfall of this nation. Just wait for the tax increases and the 7 billion in projected spending that osama-obam-laddin has promised… Tax increases on corporations, oil companies and the so on and forth… And who do you think that these Corps will pass that added cost on to?? Us maybe?? On an already weak economy, this is the CHANGE that people want??? More taxes and bigger gov?? Hey look at how good soc security works, its just awesome, paying money for nothing, obamaLadin wants us to pay MORE into that crap system.. Lets let the gov take over the medical world, they are great at managing money! Just look at how great they run business, go to the local IRS, or maybe the DMV… Or how about the city workers that need 12 people to watch 1 guy work and dig a hole. These people love what they do and are paid ALOT, I bet doctors want to go to school for 12 years and spend 1000’s on insurance because everyone in this nation is sue happy, to make city workers wages, great incentive to care about what you do..?? I want to go to a doctor that is underpaid and doesn’t care about his work because he is paid a social workers wages… Great idea dumbo-craps. Lets take advise from the Soviet Union, and Red China. Socialism is awesome, a false sense of security is all that it is.

kisli said on September 19th, 2008 at 6:16 am

great 🙂
Nicely balanced cards (in mtg sense), would sure like to get my hands on a full set. *hint hint*
CNN is my favorite, but the second ability should be IMO “…green and blue spells cost 1 more..”

about accuracy off CNN concerning taxes:
[url]http://thinkprogress.org/2008/08/26/barkley-economy-incomes/[/url]
So yeah, if you are ultra rich, it sure pays to vote McCain
Understanding of politics begins with knowledge of history. Prelude to Spanish civil war is a good paradigm.

Are Bridge to Nowhere and “Foundations of Economy are Strong” in update?

kisli said on September 19th, 2008 at 6:21 am

relevant categories:

MCCAIN OBAMA
Income Avg. tax bill Avg. tax bill
$112K-$161K -$2,614 -$2,204
$66K-$112K -$1,009 -$1,290
$38K-$66K -$319 -$1,042
$19K-$38K -$113 -$892
Under $19K -$19 -$567

kisli said on September 19th, 2008 at 6:22 am

damn
see here:
http://thinkprogress.org/2008/08/26/barkley-economy-incomes/

cchug2001 said on September 21st, 2008 at 8:30 pm

chdb: my hero once again!

Lulz said on September 21st, 2008 at 10:51 pm

Loldemocrats

Paul the Wise said on September 24th, 2008 at 6:06 pm

Dude I am totally getting a playset of Ron Paul’s. Hilary card is broken. That is what Mono Blue Decks need for the extra push.

Huckabee is perfect in Boros decks. You know the whole religious yet violent theme. Im going to order my playsets todsy!

MC said on September 27th, 2008 at 1:20 pm

This post won my blog’s weekly award, the Pageant of the Transmundane.
http://rantocracy.blogspot.com/2008/09/week-20-pageant-of-transmundane.html

Congrats… it is some great work.

Megan said on September 27th, 2008 at 4:32 pm

Incredible. I love it. LOVE IT!!!

Sunday, September 28th — Sunday Doublepak « What I Learned Today… said on September 28th, 2008 at 9:52 pm

[…] …that someone took the time to create an imaginary mini expansion set of Magic cards themed around the election. See them here. […]

Kerrick said on September 30th, 2008 at 12:17 am

As yet another Magic player (retired, lol), I found these funny as hell. Good job!

Nicky said on September 30th, 2008 at 11:02 am

Okay, this was especially amazing, because in my Illustration class we literally just started a project on making Magic cards! Too perfect…

Sam said on October 2nd, 2008 at 8:13 am

What about Dick Cheney??

michael said on October 3rd, 2008 at 10:08 pm

this is fantastic. congratz.

links for 2008-10-05 | Funny Web Pages said on October 5th, 2008 at 8:00 pm

[…] Mightygodking.com » Blog Archive » STAB AT RELEVANCE (tags: satire politics photoshop parody obama mtg magic images) […]

Fascination Place » Magic: The Electioning said on October 6th, 2008 at 8:20 pm

[…] Presidential campaign meets Magic: The Gathering in a pair of sets of mock Magic cards: One, […]

Game On said on October 13th, 2008 at 11:31 am

[…] Now that you know about Magic, recently I came across a website with the political candidates in place of creature cards. To see the full run of cards and the website I found it, go here to Mighty God King. […]

Politics: The Blathering said on November 1st, 2008 at 2:21 pm

[…] I give you the world’s next great card game: Politics: The Blathering! […]

Colt said on November 3rd, 2008 at 9:20 pm

No card on the American Armed Forces Solider and how much we kick ass?

chrisd said on November 28th, 2008 at 2:29 pm

Yeah, thats about the level that US politics has reached: a pathetic children’s card game. A+ for imagination but you should’ve spent the time writing your congressman to get us out of this mess we’re in.

ANON said on December 28th, 2008 at 2:29 pm

That’s real original lol, i just dont like that its so anti GOP

Marrec said on December 29th, 2008 at 2:03 pm

The author seems biased towards democrats, yet the cards themselves are balanced between the colors. (With a few notable exceptions) I started off playing Machine-Head and my M:tG background really wants me to build a R/B burn, but my political views beg for more Artifact cards.

ObamaCardGame said on January 3rd, 2009 at 11:05 am

Ha! I should have come here first before we designed our Obama card game. Probably could have added some really cool ideas. Anyways, check it out if you get a chance.

http://www.ObamaCardGame.com

links for 2009-01-13 « Object neo = neo Object said on January 14th, 2009 at 12:29 am

[…] Mightygodking.com » Post Topic » STAB AT RELEVANCE Humm…close. (tags: usa cardgames) […]

moo said on February 12th, 2009 at 4:55 pm

Anymore you have???

moo said on February 12th, 2009 at 4:56 pm

Anymore you have??? how u make them?

Mightygodking.com » Post Topic » Send Me To London, Guys! said on March 12th, 2009 at 2:59 pm

[…] post at TheCourt.ca debunking allegations made against Chief Justice MacLachlin, or what the hell the political Magic cards or the Joe the Homer ’shops. Tell The World: These icons link to social bookmarking sites […]

kültürfizik » Büyüklere Magicler said on August 15th, 2009 at 7:12 am

[…] politikalarıyla ilgili daha fazla kart için BSAlert ve Mightygodking‘e, Alf ve Mr T. gibi daha geyik bir şeyler arıyorsanız Yamoslair‘e, buraya […]

malakim2099 said on July 1st, 2011 at 10:00 pm

Looking back several years later… I just have to say to all the trolls that posted so long ago…

You do know the author of this blog is CANADIAN, right? He’s not going to write his Congressman… BECAUSE HE HAS NO CONGRESSMAN!

I laugh at all of you, so many years after the fact. MGK, if you see this, please get 2012 up and running for Magic: The Politicking. 😉

Mightygodking.com » Post Topic » STAB AT RELEVANCE PART 4: STABBA-LABBA-DING-DONG said on November 15th, 2011 at 9:02 am

[…] (Previously. Two. Three.) […]

Carolyne Keeler said on December 1st, 2011 at 1:49 pm

AAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! Game On! Magic Rules!

Steve Schonberger said on April 2nd, 2018 at 12:39 pm

It would be cool to see a new take on these, or maybe a similar one based on Pokémon, for the 2018 mid-terms.

Www.ideograms.ipt.pw said on January 21st, 2024 at 2:27 am

http://Www.ideograms.ipt.pw

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