Every Thursday, mightygodking.com returns to the pages of Who’s Who, the classic 1980s DC comic book encyclopedia of their characters. Every week, a character shall be judged on the only scale scientific enough that matters: the Rex The Wonder Dog scale of fantasticosity.
And then he lands in Tibet and saves a swami sort of person from bandits (well, tries to save – note that Mysto’s general aura of sheer pathos starts early), who teaches him ancient mysticism and sleight of hand. Not actual magic, you understand, in the bibbity-bobbity-boo Harry Potter/Merlin/turning you into a frog sense. The swami teaches him parlour tricks. Which, we would point out, makes this Tibetan guru in the hills quite possibly the lamest wise old hermit in the entire history of comics and quite possibly all fiction ever.
So Mysto returns to civilization when the swami dies, and stops being a bush pilot and instead becomes a children’s magician. Not even a nightclub magician: his magical skills are good enough to fool kids. So he’s not even that good a magician.
All of which leads him to conclude that his mastery of second-degree prestidigitation would best be used to fight crime.
Again: this is the DC Universe (well, early on in it to be sure, but it’s not like there weren’t actual magical characters in the Golden Age). And he’s planning to fight crime with fucking card tricks.
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“‘Illusion,’ Michael. A trick is something a whore does for money… or cocaine!”
Somehow…I must share this picture.
http://www.comicvine.com/comic/adventures-of-rex-the-wonder-dog-the/1468/2106/&i=1764
(There are other covers there, all glorious, but this one pwns).
What the hell did he do to disarm the gunman? Pull a frigging quarter out of his ear?
Your 15% is REALLY generous.
Hate to go off-topic, but: any thoughts yet on the Secret Invasion hullaballoo, or are you skipping the whole thing?
MGK isn’t talking about Secret Invasion . . . because he’s a Skrull! And knowing his fondness for scans_daily . . . an ANAL SKRULL!
Women like magicians. This is truth.
Besides, you’re talkin bout the DCU. Compared to some mainstream villains this origin is damned near inspired.
Now, a story about a hardened military pilot who goes down in Tibet and learns about wonder and mystery from a wise old hermit through the medium of the magic tricks and takes this new philosophy back to the states to become a children’s performing, much to the confusion of his former friends and family… This would make for a great drama.
I did once try to write a comic about a women whose power was being the single greatest practitioner of sleight of hand in the world. But in my defense, she was going to have improbable shit, like swords and shotguns, up her sleeves. And her back story included Brazillian nazis.
NCallahan: His origin would make for a great little drama, yes. Right up to the point where he decides the logical next step of action is to fight crime. Then, not so much.
I wish there were more totally freaking ridiculous origins like this in comics today. They’re all kind of cut-n-paste these days. “Bullied as a kid! Got powers! Fought back for GREAT JUSTICE!” “Mutant! Fighting for GREAT JUSTICE!” Whatever.
I like that his origin story is totally bloody stupid.
And that’s Mysto’s “52 pickup” super;power right there.
/wonders if post-modern mysticism would be a nifty thing to learn, or not.
You could do a lot of damage administering awkward deep paper cuts with those playing cards. I bet Deadshot wouldn’t be so handy with the guns after getting a vicious paper cut between his thumb and forefinger. It’s completely plausible that you could fight crime by baffling your enemies with the amount of brightly colored silk scarves you pulled out of their sleeves. What the-? Where’d all those BIRDS come from? Holy shit, I’d better not steal all the rare black diamonds from this jewelry store now, there are two large interlocking metal rings locking the doors and I just can’t figure out how separate them!
Poor bastard, he really need a hug and a temp agency.
Scans Daily just reminded me of someone who might be able to give Mysto a run for his money.
Prisioner 711, he fights crime with the power of being locked up in prision. (Seriously.)
Dammit, is he a Dr. Strange parody or not!!! I need to know!
His super power is being the creep at the airport bar.