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You kind of have to feel sorry for poor old Carcharo. Todd McFarlane and Roy Thomas wanted to tell a story about a villainous shark-man. But the problem with villainous shark-men is that there are already some people who have firmly claimed that niche as their own – Tiger Shark, Killer Shark, King Shark, the Shark (he’s the one with no adjective), and of course Jabber Jaw. The essential point being made here is that there are no end of shark-themed supervillains. If you’re going to create a new one, you need to bring something new to the table.
What Carcharo brings to the table is giant shoulder pads. Cable-quality metallic shoulder pads, a full four years before Cable was created. (Or maybe afterwards. Cable is a time-traveller, you see.) That is what distinguishes him from all the other shark villains. Other shark villains think “I will be like a shark – sleek, hydrodynamic and deadly.” Carcharo, on the other hand, decided that he was so sharky he needed a handicap, so clearly he needed giant shoulder pads to slow him down!
Beyond the shoulder pads, there’s really very little that makes Carcharo unique. I mean, blah blah genetic experimentation as baby yada yada yada I think there are like six shark villains all with that same origin. You’d think at some point there’d be a shark villain who just decided after watching Shark Week one week that this was his ticket to supervillainy, but no – it’s always genetic experimentation as a baby.
Also, Carcharo died of a combination of cyanide poisoning and being stabbed with shrapnel. How do you even manage that? Cyanide is not supposed to be a slow death! You get enough of it in you and BAM, that’s it, there’s shouldn’t be enough time to say “hey, don’t stab me with that met-“.
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In fairness to Carcharo, he apparently did manage to score himself a pair of lady companions, (who presumably were banned from most aquariums) and that’s more than most shark villains do. What with them being sharks and all.
Top comment: OK, just a quick question. His mother is alleged, but the unknown father gets a pass on that? How, exactly, does that work? — Ambrael
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I didn’t know Bones lost most of his left leg.
I think we can all agree that the most important question about Carcharo is, “Does he have frickin’ laser beams?”
Why does he have an Omac belt buckle?
The first think that popped into my head: ‘Coochie Coochie Coochie!’
Was I wrong to think that? Oh well, I’m going to go hum the theme to Love Boat now.
What does he use those things on the front of his shoulderpads for? With how sad it is for him to be wearing them at all, I assume it’s for something useless. “Take a deep breath of my MUSTARD GAS! Oh, wait…we’re underwater…well, maybe you’ll swallow some! Ha-ha!”
Sometimes I don’t understand how Leifield takes all the flak he does when McFarlane does shit like this.
There’s a lot to love here, but only if you love terrible stuff. Like his origin involves being born a freak and left alone in the wilderness, but this doesn’t stop him from learning to speak English, getting a pair of hootchies, and his own SHARK-THEMED SUBMARINE. You know how expensive those things are? You can’t just buy a sub and take it to Orange County Choppers.
Plus, mutated baby may be par for the shark villain course, but how many of them can trace that mutation to a guy who supports his mad science hobby with his gynecology practice?
It amused me to note that he’s described as a “professional criminal”. Well, sure! I wonder if that’s what he puts on his tax forms. Oh wait, he’s a pro; I’m sure he didn’t pay taxes.
Also, if he’s supposed to be a shark-guy, why did McFarlane draw him with a snake’s head and teeth?
“– Carcharo –”
Someone was hankering for mexican when they came up with this name. Makes me want to pick up some fish tacos. Does he ever join a super group with Churasco and Chalupa?
“he apparently did manage to score himself a pair of lady companions, (who presumably were banned from most aquariums)”
There’s a great Troy McClure/Selma Bouvier joke in here somewhere.
HAHAHAHA, look at his freaking chest. Those shoulder pads cover up his Shark cellulite!
Wait… he’s connected to a group of mutants with an X in their name? Isn’t that a bit… someone else does thar?
“I’m a shark.”
“Dude. Your head looks more like it came from a rattlesnake. The fangs, too.”
“I said I’m a FRICKIN’ SHARK!”
“Okay, okay, you’re a shark.”
“That’s better.”
“Nice water wings.”
“Oh, it is ON, Aqualad…”
“Carcharo” comes from “Carcharodon”, which is the generic name of the group of lamnid sharks that includes great whites and megalodons.
Admittedly, it wouldn’t be the time for rational thought, but I always wondered why the mom died trying to drown shark-baby there…Look, if you gave birth to a terrible bird monster, you wouldn’t try to kill it by throwing it off a building, right? It’d fly away, leaving you looking quite the fool. Same principle.
“gynecologist Dr. Love”? Really?
@Brandi: It’s a little-known fact that KISS, as a group, were huge Carcharo fans. “Calling Dr. Love” was the first in what was to be a comic book tribute album, but creative differences derailed the project and the song was later incorporated into another album.
At least he’s dead, until the next time there’s a massive super-villain crowd shot, and some artist throws him in the background, and then they pretend he never died. STAY DEAD, YOU STUPID SHARK!
Brandi: Hilarious. I can’t believe I didn’t pick up on that. They need to resurrect this guy, that is way to funny to pass up.
Maybe they were trying to be ironic.
Still, it doesn’t compare to his partner Pat Shmear.
According to his stats he’s 6’4″ and weighs 138 lbs. I assume that’s his weight soaking wet.
God, I hate myself for that.
(seriously, 138 lbs? That’s got to be a typo. He’s got twiggy little arms, but check out those Leifield thighs! Plus, he’s wearing a metallic shoulder-pad breastplate ensemble that has to be about half that.)
You say that, but you’re eating a burrito right now. Just admit it.
Maybe he’s only 138 because he’s mainly cartilage as opposed to bone? Would genetic engineering make your bones squishy?
Good point Ken, it gave him water wings and a snakehead, why not squishy bones?
Maybe the 6’4″ includes his head fin (sort of like Fletch and his afro). From the picture it looks like the fin is 2 1/2 heads high, and that would make Carcharo’s standing height something like 5’2″.
I have offically thought too much about this now.
As far as I know only King Shark isn’t a genetic freak. His momma had a night of sweet aqua-love with the Shark God. The Great White Shark is just a weirdo. There’s also Tiger Shark from Marvel.
CHOMP CHOMP!
His momma had a night of sweet aqua-love with the Shark God.
… Yep, that sentence has done exactly what you were hoping it would do. It’s ten to midnight here, but now I can’t go to bed for fear of my dreams.
For once I would appreciate a dolphin supervillain…..
Those feckers are smiling about something!
Why dolphins are smiling?
Rape and murder.
That’s the basic Dolphin Mo.
A dolphin supervillain would fit right in with Dr. Light, at minimum.
The cartoon version of The Tick had a dolphin villain. Total jerk who built a fish magnet…
The only thing that came to mind after reading the name was this. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charo
One is less scary than the other. I’ll let you decide which. Also, lack of tits.
Cuchi cuchi!
His female companions were called “Remoras”?
A.k.a shark suckers?
Oh, that is the dirtiest joke Roy Thomas ever told…
OK, just a quick question. His mother is alleged, but the unknown father gets a pass on that? How, exactly, does that work?
Maybe his 138 lb weight is attributed to the fact that his body appears to be made out of mashed potatoes.
Zifnab: Technically, I’m eating sweet tarts.
It’s worth repeating to those of you who are doubting Carcharo’s origin story that *we are repeatedly warned, here and in related materials, that there are good reasons NOT to believe what we are told about the Helix kids’ origins.*
Maybe he was stabbed by a harpoon dipped in cyanide, for when you really want your fish-based monsters dead.
“Carcharo, on the other hand, decided that he was so sharky he needed a handicap, so clearly he needed giant shoulder pads to slow him down!”
To me it looks more like he’s wearing a flotation vest.
Which is pretty sad for a shark villain.
[…] because the vast majority of his appearances have been drawn by George Perez. If ninety percent of Carcharo’s appearances were drawn by George Perez, he would be a totally awesome villain, rather than the […]