25

May

Inspired by true events

Posted by   Published in Bad Comedy

Top comment: How do you masturbate poorly? Do you just not finish? After you fail to masturbate would you look at yourself in the mirror and say “You’re just a fucking tease.” Can I take 20 to masturbate? — Lister Sage

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dmart said on May 25th, 2009 at 9:44 am

FUCKING AWESOME. I particularly LOL’d at the Chinatown reference.
For future reference, though, the super-thick vertical black bar was a bit distracting; you could have gone with nothing but space there. Not that that reduces the quality of the jokes.

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MK said on May 25th, 2009 at 10:10 am

I loled 😛

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Bitsy said on May 25th, 2009 at 10:11 am

I…can’t tell if any of these are actually real. I’m officially old and unhip!

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Rob Brown said on May 25th, 2009 at 10:48 am

It is good to see others have LOL’d. Now I can admit to having LOL’d without shame.

My favourite? “Mjolnir.” 😀

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Samus said on May 25th, 2009 at 11:06 am

As a member of the youthful public….oh dear lord this is funny.

I plan on using these! ALL OF THEM.

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rwe1138 said on May 25th, 2009 at 11:08 am

Oh Ernest Borgnine, you scamp.

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Sage Freehaven said on May 25th, 2009 at 11:40 am

We should e-mail this to every politician in the country.

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Zenrage said on May 25th, 2009 at 12:38 pm

A moose once bit by sister.

Mjolnir?

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MarvinAndroid said on May 25th, 2009 at 1:01 pm

Alternate abbreviation for Mjolnir: TMH, or Thor’s Mighty Hammer. Also IGGY, for Yggdrasil the world tree.

Oh those wacky kids.

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Eric S. Smith said on May 25th, 2009 at 1:16 pm

And all this time, I thought they were just swingin’ on the flippity flop!

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coren said on May 25th, 2009 at 2:31 pm

The fact that even half of these are actually real makes me weep

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John Seavey said on May 25th, 2009 at 8:08 pm

Of course, “WorF” is “woman or female”, while “Worf” is “Klingon Uncle Tom”. Feel free to append that to the list in the appropriate place. 🙂

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Panzer said on May 26th, 2009 at 5:05 am

Sadly (or perhaps awesomely) my GF has been calling my wang Mjolnir for years.

…Hell, it’s a large part of why I love her, lol!

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dom said on May 27th, 2009 at 12:44 pm

Hahahaha, the infinite oral sex with infinite snowmen one made me laugh really loud in an internet cafe, and there´s no way I´m gonna try and explain that in Spanish….

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KDBryan said on May 28th, 2009 at 2:26 am

I fondly remember the iconic all-white cover of Crisis On Infinite Oral Sex With Infinite Snowmen.

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Lister Sage said on May 29th, 2009 at 1:11 pm

How do you masterbate poorly? Do you just not finish? After you fail to masterbate would you look at yourself in the mirror and say “Your just a fucking tease.” Can I take 20 to masterbate?

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marvinmartian said on June 5th, 2009 at 11:15 am

Mjolnir….heh now I’m remembering Captain Hammer again.

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