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mygif

Just a little comment from the South Hemisphere: the four stars are the Southern Cross, a constellation which is only visible from down here all year round (i think it can be seen from some tropical place too) and which points towards the south much like the Little Dipper. That’s why it’s in these flags, together with the Union Jack (as in the aussie flag) it says something like ‘hey! we’re kinda British, only not, and we’re waaaay down south!’

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mygif

I too have long questioned the use of the Union Jack in other flags.

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mygif

You forgot, in your list of things that are cool about New Zealand, the fact that they have some of the craziest mofo horror-movie makers ever down there. Not just Peter Jackson, who has a horror movie with a kung-fu priest and a guy who straps a lawnmower to his chest, blade outwards, and runs headlong into a crowd of zombies. No, there’s also the guys who made “Black Sheep”, a horror movie about genetically-engineered killer sheep that turn people into weresheep with their bite.

That’s some quality horror movie insanity.

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mygif

Also it would probably be best if that flat didn’t look almost exactly like Australia’s flag. It’s like showing up to the Commonwealth get-togethers in the same dress.

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mygif

We are well aware our flags are sub-par; our national anthem is even worse. For some time now, we having be trying to work towards a combination of blood, stars and fernery that truly symbolises our national culture. To no avail thusfar.

Currently various Maori groups are convening to try and choose a flag to represent the collective Maori nation. I suggest you submit your entry MGK.

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mygif

As New Zealand is officially Middle Earth now, why can’t they appropriate the flag of Gondor?

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mygif

The sheep look perplexed.

I do rather like the next-to-last flag, with the fern and the southern cross.

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mygif

Needs more cowbell

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Jonny Kiehlmann said on July 20th, 2009 at 12:08 pm

Agog:

I remember being in a big game of Trivial Pursuit which involved one of my lecturers, who is from NZ. There was a question: “Which national anthem is the following quote from?”

After deciding it had to be an English speaking country, they had only a few candidates. He was certain it wasn’t the NZ anthem. They went for Australia. It was NZ.

Mind you, I’m sure most countries could have the same thing

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mygif

One of the big issues of flag design like all heraldry is the need to recognize them from a distance against all types of backgrounds. Which is why busy flags look like shit, indistinct blobs. Also flags that can easily be drawn in school by kids with crayons ups the level of nationalism in the population at large.

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mygif

I dream of one day living in a world where people don’t think it’s cute or funny to use the word ‘gay’ in that way, but I may have to wait until after the death of Judd Apatow.

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mygif

It took me until I finished the post and started to reread to realize that this was Flapjacks, and not MGK on a bender. (Yes yes, I’ve heard the “Fight Club” theory.)
The use of the Union Jack in the upper left corner reminds me of the field of stars on the American flag. How many other (non-Commonwealth) flags have that layout?

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sonofzeal said on July 20th, 2009 at 1:49 pm

Which National Anthem Is The Following Quote From, play-at-home edition:

“Ruler supreme, who hearest humble prayer”.

No using google. 😛

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mygif

Unfortunately, it looks like a giant tentacle. I do not think this is good advertising for New Zealand.

You’re kidding, right? They would be flooded with tourism if they could increase their connection with giant tentacles. Everybody loves cephalopods.

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mygif

While I absolutely concur that the second to last flag is the best design, there are worse flags out there than those that use the Union Jack.

Look at the state flags of the United States and how many of them use those god-awful state seals for their flags. There is simply no excuse, in this day and age, for any flag to be as mindlessly butt-ugly as the Wisconsin State Flag.

http://www.50states.com/flag/wiflag.htm

Behold, the seal means so much to its people that they had to stick “Wisconsin” on the flag so people would know what the hell they were talking about.

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Lister Sage said on July 20th, 2009 at 2:22 pm

The eight flag reminds me of the logo for major league baseball. Now, individual’s mileage my differ on this, but I can’t say I’m a fan.

SmR: I must admit that I was on to the fact that it was Flapjacks pretty early. MGK is a lot of things, but I personally wouldn’t add modesty to them. When you title a blog post “Sarah Palin is still an idiot.” then I’m very aware that he has opinions and so couldn’t see why he would title a post that. So I immediately checked to see who’d posted it.

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mygif

Minus the Southern Cross, that second-to-last one could be a kickass National Fernball League logo.

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Robin of Loxley said on July 20th, 2009 at 2:54 pm

“That’s what the Union Jack is when you’re not British and it’s on your flag.”

Union FLAG if it’s not on the jack staff of a ship. It’s the flag of the British monarch, not of the country- we just happen to use it. Think of it as showing props.

The monarch therefore knows they can count on Australia, New Zealand, Tuvalu and Hawaii to have their back in royal rumble, should any two-bit nation unwisely decide to ‘throw it down’.

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mygif

On the plus side, the giant tentacle could attract Cthulhu tourism. And you can fail your sanity roll by just looking at it.

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Lawnmower Boy said on July 20th, 2009 at 4:41 pm

So there’s, what, 3 million New Zealanders? I’d guess you’d see at least that many go through a Vienna youth hostel on a good day (therefore, some Australians are faking!).
So wouldn’t the ideal flag be a sign that said, “Country closed. Gone backpacking, back in 2012.”
(Your opinions matter to us: email NewZealand7@Gmail.com?)

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mygif

There is simply no excuse, in this day and age, for any flag to be as mindlessly butt-ugly as the Wisconsin State Flag.
http://www.50states.com/flag/wiflag.htm

Never mind ugly — what is the baking soda arm doing on the Wisconsin flag?

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Canadave said on July 20th, 2009 at 5:48 pm

@SmR: That’s pretty common, actually. In Australia and New Zealand’s case, it’s a Blue Ensign, and in the case of the current flags of Ontario, the same thing is done on a Red Ensign (which was the former flag of Canada).

See here and here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Ensign
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue_Ensign

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invisiblemoose said on July 20th, 2009 at 6:40 pm

NEW ZEALAND HAD THE FLAG BEFORE AUSTRALIA!!

This isn’t two people showing up at get-togethers in the same dress. This is Australia showing up, seeing the nice Dress that New Zealand has, and then /going and buying one just like it/.

That’s a pretty awesome suggestion though, Flapjacks. Think you can fit a hobbit on there somewhere?

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Fred Davis said on July 20th, 2009 at 9:17 pm

What’s the problem with the union flag? It is clearly the second best flag ever, as it symbolises scotland’s ability to be magnificent bastardry, and the english dickishness of completely excluding the welsh from having any representation in the flag.

However the first ferny one is better, as it’s not just a tentacle, it’s a tentacle reaching out and curled up as if grasping for something – it symbolises not just that New Zealand clearly has an invincible army of laser powered cephlapods, which it better have if it’s going to go with that one, but with those laser powered cephlapods new zealand will reach out and crush any that oppose her.

Did you pick the nazi/roman lightning bolts thing in the last one for a particular reason? And isn’t there a law against canadians actually ending anything with “eh?”

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mygif

Woah woah woah. Wait just a minute here. New Zealand does not dominate in cricket.

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mygif

@Fred: And don’t forget Cornwall. Could get away with a few black stripes on the flag.

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mygif

I take it you chose to ignore this version of the Maori flag because it’s totally awesome and leaves your argument in tatters Mr Flapjacks?

http://digitalwhitireia.com/2008websites/L4-Web/Lisa_gripp/800px-Flag_of_Maori.svg%5B1%5D.png

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mygif

The flag should have the Rhymenoceros and the Hiphopopotomus on it…

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Sofa King said on July 25th, 2009 at 3:37 pm

Ought to have a red/white/blue tentacle. Cthulu is a patriot!

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V is for Vice said on July 25th, 2009 at 5:13 pm

well, truth be told any flag prominently featuring a leaf is kind of sad, really. The new zealand flag would be much more accurate if it were just i picture of a jar of marmite, since thats pretty much the only thing they eat.

Also, the canadian flag would be improved, if it were a silouette of the USA wearing a funny looking hat, with an arrow pointing to the hat.

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mygif

Hilarious critique! I see that the latest post here is from six years ago, so I suspect moderation has closed off new comments. I continue typing nevertheless. The Koru flag you refer to as a hippie flag was designed by Hundertwasser. I used it on a brief bio I wrote on Hundertwasser years ago on HubPages, called “Hundertwasser: Spirals Turrets and Toilets”. I kinda liked it, but I know nothing about art. I liked the one you labeled “GAY”, for example. The “contest winner” flag here is atrocious. Immediately reminded me of a swastika. I agree with your final pick, and your rationale.

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mygif

Obviously flags are more important and long-lasting than web pages, judging solely by the dates of the comments here. This is the most interesting (of many very interesting) TED talks so far in 2015. All about design and flag criticism. Design of everything really – radio, tv, TED talk, writing, social constructs, really great stuff. TED comment areas are stultifyingly banal, because they moderate out anything that sounds like criticism. I wrote a finely tuned little 3-paragraph comment on this TED page, self-mocking, self-conscious, perfectly in tune with the medium and message of the talk and the design of the talk, (which is the very essence of criticism and deconstruction) and it got modified away:

http://www.ted.com/talks/roman_mars_why_city_flags_may_be_the_worst_designed_thing_you_ve_never_noticed

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mygif

A friend of mine once said, NZ is a garden of God

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