FLAPJACKS: So why aren’t you nominated for this year’s Canadian blog awards?
ME: I’m not?
FLAPJACKS: Nope.
ME: Are you sure?
FLAPJACKS: I used your computer and everything.
ME: Which reminds me, you owe me half a dozen bagels.
FLAPJACKS: I got you bagels.
ME: You got me circular bread from Loblaws. Do we have to have the bagel talk again?
FLAPJACKS: No.
ME: Good. Anyway. I figured that since I won last year I’d get auto-nominated or something.
FLAPJACKS: It doesn’t work that way, I guess. Didn’t you just nominate yourself last year?
ME: No.
FLAPJACKS: What, somebody else nominated you? For real?
ME: For real. I didn’t even know the Canadian Blog Awards existed. I figured self-nominating was, like, against the rules or something.
FLAPJACKS: Or at least just not classy.
ME: Exactly. It’s like wearing a business suit to a white-tie event.
FLAPJACKS: But on the other hand now you’re not gonna win the award two years running.
ME: And I’m not irritated about that at all.
FLAPJACKS: I don’t think you –
ME: At. All.
FLAPJACKS: Gotcha.
ME: Anyway, other than Yarn Harlot all the blogs there are mostly teeny. I have bigger fish to fry. Bigger and better internet site awards await!
FLAPJACKS: Have you ever even been nominated for one of those?
ME: Shut up.
FLAPJACKS: And didn’t you actively campaign to win some of them?
ME: Shut up.
FLAPJACKS: Man, you’re testy.
ME: That’s what happens when people steal my bagels.
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I bet MGK has essentially a “bagel tax” when he goes to buy bagels.
“Here are the bagels that I consume, and here are the bagels Flapjacks will steal from me”
Say, I don’t suppose you’d switch formats to a knitting and/or crocheting blog, would you? You know, like if you don’t have anything better to do?
While the loblaws bagels are essentially circular bread, being beaten handily by Kettlemans, Loblaws has one thing that can’t be beat right now. That’s right PC fudge Candy Cane Crackle Ice Cream, and it’s bastard non-seasonal brother, PC fudge caramel crackle Ice Cream
http://www.presidentschoice.ca/LCLOnline/products.jsp?type=details&catIds=cat40002&catIds=115&next=37&productId=17871
I have the weirdest feeling that someday we’ll discover Flapjacks is either secretly your teenaged son or your stitched-together Igor-creature-servant.
Either way, it sounds like you’re bringing him up well.
Man, I love a good bagel. Light, fluffy dough… You just can’t beat it!
Does it count as stealing bagels when no matter who eats them, they end up in MGK’s body?
Yes. I fully believe Flapjacks is his alternate personality he created after the horror he experienced with McDonalds Monopoly.
Find me a complete run of Captain Al Cohol (yes it’s real and Canadien too) and I will find a way to get you nominated.
You have to nominate yourself? That seems almost rude.
Stig: who’s to say it isn’t both? Kids have accidents, you know. So many accidents.
They have bagels in Toronto? Are they real bagels like we have in Montreal or the abomination that’s a New York bagel?
Perhaps if we all pool our financial resources, we can hire a private investigator and learn the truth once and for all. We just need somebody good enough to spy on every single conversation he has with everybody without him noticing. Then, if any of those exchanges get posted here, we’ll finally have our answer!
Either that, or the PI may just get footage of Bird talking to an empty room, which would also give us our answer.