BringtheNoise in response to yesterday’s Punisher post: So, what brought this on? For starters, here’s a list of the top 30 movies of 2009 thus far: Star Trek Monsters Vs. Aliens Up X-Men Origins: Wolverine Fast and Furious Paul Blart: Mall Cop Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian Taken Angels & Demons The […]

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Stupid humans! Can’t speak dog! Can’t even understand dog! Luckily, it turns out that “descending to lesser beings’ level” is a specialty of Rex the motherfucking Wonder Dog. Top comment: “The dog is trying to communicate with us. Let’s see… good lord, Sam, this dog is drawing a bong!” — End of the World

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Torontoist asked me to write about a relentlessly self-promoting gossip blogger. So I did. Top comment: That shirt may not be photoshopped, but killer shades that radical have to be outlawed in real life. — HittheTargets

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2012: Marvel Studios, in partnership with Lionsgate, makes Punisher War Journal, starring Adam Baldwin as the Punisher, Hector Elizondo as the evil Mexican drug lord Cervantes, and Molly Parker as the whore who falls in love with Frank Castle. Joe Quesada explains in interviews that the previous Punisher movies “weren’t violent enough” to capture “the […]

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My weekly TV column is up at Torontoist.

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“What’s the most important thing in life?” “Respect.” “Too dependent on other people.” “Love?” “A little Disneyland, isn’t it?” “God’s will.” “Close.” “What is it then?” “Necessity.” “As in?” “As in people do what is most necessary to them at any given moment.” The 90s were actually a pretty damn good decade for movies, but […]

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This is mindblowingly impressive.

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LIKED – The Hangover justifies the hype; it is bust-a-gut funny and often, for a comedy where a guy humps a tiger, wickedly smart. If you had told me a couple of years ago that Bradley Cooper would finally make the jump to true stardom in a comedy where the funniest bits all go to […]

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The Pomengranate Smartphone ad is one of the better viral ads I’ve seen in a while. Top comment: I’m sure nova scotia has everything I want, If all I want is salmon. oooooooh, burn!!! Take that Nova Scotia — Count Baqula

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In the previous Mark Steyn post, Cosmo accused me of ad hominem argument, then, when I told him he didn’t actually seem to understand what ad hominem was, went and got the dictionary definition (or, well, the about.com definition, anyway) and still managed to get it wrong: “Ad hominem is a Latin term meaning “to […]

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BEEP You have forty-seven new messages. BEEP “Lucy? It’s Bertram. I know I’ve been kind of busy lately, and I know you were all on me to get a job, so I’ve been thinking – maybe I should become a professional criminal? I mean, I’m already an entomologist. That’s kind of like being a professional […]

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The top 20 is finally here! Look at them dance! Your host is Cat “best host ever” Deeley. Your judges are Nigel Lythgoe, Mary Murphy, and Adam Shankman, who just wants you to know he loves the whole world and everything in it. Be prepared for an onslaught of praise, because “top 20 week” is […]

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This was requested repeatedly in comments and then in email, and I didn’t have a post planned for today, and the first competition episode of season 5 is tonight, so I decided “what the hell.” Group dances in SYTYCD follow an interesting evolution. There weren’t any group dances in the first season (beyond a very […]

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People sometimes try to convince me that Mark Steyn’s drivel is worth taking seriously. As counter, I suggest people read his latest screed for Maclean’s wherein he bravely tackles the demon that is empathy: Then-senator Obama voted against the confirmation of Chief Justice Roberts because the nominee said he saw the judge’s role as that […]

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