So I am looking at the World Cup draws and MGK was complaining about how “fucking Italy gets a walk to the semis,” and he doesn’t like Italy because he thinks they play the game like dicks somehow. I’m not up on soccer beyond the basics, but I assume they try to bribe referees or […]

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So for everybody else in Canada it is “Thursday” but for me it is Thanksgiving II because my dad is American and he always insists on having Thanksgiving on American Thanksgiving but my mom is Canadian so she always insists on having Thanksgiving on Canadian Thanksgiving, and eventually they compromised by having two Thanksgivings. I […]

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Someone oughta edit a Youtube where Sandra Bullock, the abusive boss in The Proposal, falls in love with Sandra Bullock, the unappreciated assistant in Two Weeks’ Notice. If you do this you owe me a million dollars.

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So I been paying all sorts of attention to the whole American healthcare debate, by which I mean MGK pays attention to it and when we go out for beers he is all “healthcare this Republicans that” and I am all “dude drink your beer” and he is all “but this affects our own healthcare […]

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Okay so like imagine in your mind that there is a public men’s room that you are about to use in a place that gets a reasonable amount of traffic. The men’s room has two urinals and one toilet stall. When you walk in to take a leak, there is one guy, using one of […]

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So I am watching The Good Wife which is a TV show that is all “what if a cheating politician’s wife had to be a lawyer and defend innocent people from the electric chair?” (Except that that’s not quite right because she is not defending from the electric chair. If lawyers had to do that […]

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Now maybe you go to a big convention and you see someone in an unfamiliar costume and you are all “gosh I wish I knew who that was, but I can’t say that out loud or I will lose valuable nerd cred, and nerd cred is the only cred I have since I came to […]

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…an entire table full of mousepads, where the mousepads are Japanese anime girls and the wrist protectors are their titties. (insert Rutger Hauer’s death speech from Blade Runner here)

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So I went to see G.I. Joe and don’t belive the critics because this movie is fantastic. Unless the critics said it was good. Then you can believe them. Those critics! Never know what they’re going to be critical about! Anyway I know a lot of you are skeptical so sit back. I am going […]

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It has been a while since I posted on this here blog so I figure it is time that I discuss a subject of critical importance! And that subject today will be the flags of New Zealand. New Zealand is a pretty awesome country! I mean, think of all it has going for it. Like, […]

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I have decided that I am gonna start up my own life-hacking website, wherein I will teach people to do things in different ways than they previously did them! (I am not doing this to raise funds to change my name because I am afraid of Steven Seagal. We have chatted, and he is cool. […]

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I’m extremely powerful but I don’t want to boast I can use my heat vision to make fresh heated toast And technically I’m much stronger than Diana or J’onn Nearly as fast as Wally, I don’t think that I’m wrong I’m just as smart as Batman though some people think I”m not I know that […]

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I have decided that I am going to write for the television. After all, if John Rogers can do it, anybody can do it! It is an especially great career for me because you don’t need no special training or knowledge except the power of imagination! And I have plenty of imagination. If you could […]

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Best not come to battle because if you battle me You’re gonna suffer a fucking bat-astrophe Kal-El, what the hell, you wanna get in a fight Fucker step off or I’ll synthesize Kryptonite Diana, I wanna introduce my Batpole To every one of your wonderful Wonder-holes Green Lanterns? Fuck you, you’re alla you overpaid I’ll […]

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Hey, are any of you people the people who buy the comic books with the variant covers that cost like thirty dollars because the comic store has to order twenty of the standard cover to get one copy of the fancy cover? And do you pay for those special comic books in retard dollars? Hey, […]

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